Over the past few years, I’ve become tragically proficient at functioning in a state of sleep deprivation. Starting in my teens, I began having trouble both falling and staying asleep and it can be an incredibly frustrating state of existence.
Tonight, I started getting ready for bed at 11:45 p.m. My bedtime routine consists of washing my face, setting up my diffuser for the night, filling up a glass of water and a quick stretch before I climb into bed. By 12:15 a.m. I was listening to Nick Offerman read “The Big Bad Wolf Learns Anger Management” through the “Calm” app, which has a variety of short audiobooks that are designed to help people fall asleep. At 4:17 a.m. I accept that I am not going to be successful in sleeping tonight, so here I sit at 4:48 a.m. writing this article.This pattern is uncomfortably familiar for me. I have treatment-resistant insomnia, which means that even with medical intervention, I still struggle to get enough sleep at night. I have tried meditation apps, sleepy teas, changing my diet, having immaculate sleep hygiene, making sure I have enough physical exercise, etc. And sure, I like to think that these things help, that my sleep would be worse if I didn’t spray lavender oil on my silk pillowcases or do night-time yoga. But some nights, like tonight, I wonder if I’m really just coping by trying to convince myself I have some control over my body.
I would desperately like to have some control over my sleep, instead I think that sleep, or lack of, has control over me. At 24 hours without sleep, I can still function relatively well. I’m still able to write tests, attend work and be social without any noticeable impairments. By 36 hours without sleep, I’m more likely to start crying uncontrollably, have a panic attack and my mood will be low. As well, I can be pretty slow, so you may need to ask me to do things multiple times, and if I attend classes I will sit there very confused. By 48 hours, I’ll probably start hallucinating.
It’s a vicious cycle. As my mental health gets worse, so does my insomnia. But, the less I sleep, the less stable I feel and the worse my mental health becomes. According to Harvard Med, people with insomnia are 5 times more likely to develop depression. It’s theorized that sleep deprivation disrupts the ability of the amygdala, the emotional control center of your brain, to regulate mood and will have heightened responses to negative stimuli
If you’re having trouble with getting enough sleep, there are a number of things you can do. The first step is to evaluate what changes you can make on your own to improve your sleep hygiene. Develop a nightly routine, something that you can consistently do to train your brain that it is time to relax and fall asleep. Turn off your electronic devices an hour before bed, because studies have shown that the light from screens is damaging to your sleep cycle, and often electronic devices are a source of stress.
If you think that you’ve done all that you can reasonably do by yourself to improve your sleep cycle, consider visiting your healthcare provider to seek their advice. Medical treatments to improve sleep can come in the form of behavioural and cognitive therapy or medication.
As students, sleep deprivation is normalized; pulling an ‘all-nighter’ before a test feels necessary and there are always assignments to do that may make you feel almost guilty to call it quits for the night. But sleep sets you up to function better cognitively, to improve your happiness and to physically feel well; it is something you should prioritize.
If you’re in a position where you are sleep-deprived and you need to function, here are some things I’ve found to be helpful:
1. Look better than you feel.
Wear an outfit that makes you feel confident and embrace the cake-face. Even though you might feel like a pile of hot garbage, there’s something to be said for faking it until you make it.
2. Minimize your commitments.
Figure out what you absolutely need to do, and figure out what you can do to take things off your plate. Most professors are really understanding about extensions, as long as you contact them in advance, and even an extra day can make everything feel more manageable.
3. Coffee, but only to a point.
Caffeine is probably the love of my life, but you don’t want it to further sabotage your sleep. Think about when it is you’ll be able to sleep, and stop drinking coffee and other caffeinated beverages a few hours before that point.
4. Be kind to yourself and accept that you’re not functioning how you normally would.
It can be embarrassing when you’re overly-emotional or if you don’t do as well on a test as you think you could’ve normally. But do the best that you can, and accept that there are some things you can’t control.