An Open Letter to My Therapist

To my therapist,

I remember the first day I went to see you. My feet dragging my petite, insecure body into the door frame of your office. Being super shy, I was not used to opening up and had no intention of therapy really working for me. All I remember thinking is "here we go again." This was due to not being able to click with my former therapist. I was confused why I was there that day, why my parents were so persistent. Now I understand and couldn't thank them enough for introducing me to someone so essential in my life. For a while I was scared there was a stigma to poor mental health-that if I got help there was something wrong with me. The fact is, seeing a therapist was one of the best blessings in disguise and looking back I wish I knew it sooner. I've learned to embrace therapy and suggest it for anyone, no matter what for. Point is, if you want to be there and put your mind to it, change can happen in a session of therapy. You just have to want to help yourself.

As I sit here writing this at 19, there is so much to compare. I have come such a long way since being a young teenager. Looking back, some of my biggest stressors back then are laughable now. It shows how perspective really does matter. Today, I have similar stressors, just with more mature problems. Sometimes it takes 50 minutes for helping to untangle the whole mess in my head-It's sometimes hard for me to see the truth and put everything into perspective. Although I have trouble letting go of the past, it makes me feel better knowing that I have someone to go to, who knows the in and outs of all of my teenage years, so when I am reminiscing on the past, you are able to see where I am coming from. People have come and gone throughout my life, but the people who have been consistent have been you and my parents. 

I came to therapy to gain more confidence and as a way to distress and vent any emotions I'm feeling. It hasn't always stayed this way as more challenging things have surfaced, but I know when I walk out of your office a little under an hour later, I feel weight off my shoulders and have a feeling that I can get through it. It is fascinating to look back all the way to the beginning and how my thought process was. Sure, I was young and everyone grows up and matures, but I feel as though I gained knowledge about myself sooner than most. Not to mention, I am a completely different person from who I was, mentally speaking. My mirror wouldn't recognize me. You were, and still are one of my biggest advocates in school, relationships, life in general, and everything in between. I look forward to our meetings, consisting on catching up and laughs like old friends, and am constantly thriving to be the best person I can be.

Thank you. Thank you for all the help and advice. Thank you for hyping me up and making me feel like I can do anything I put my mind to. Thank you for encouraging me to put myself out there, when I would rather hide behind the curtain. I wouldn't be the strong, independent young woman I am now, without the help and guidance from all these years.

Sincerely,

Your patient, and more importantly, friend