“Soft launch” and “hard launch” are two buzzy terms from the dating world that have earned a permanent spot in my vocabulary. “Soft launch” and “hard launch” are typically used to describe clever, exciting ways to debut your relationship on social media — particularly Instagram and TikTok — and I can’t get enough. Even celebrities have taken part in the fun, like Vanessa Hudgens and her MLB player boyfriend Cole Tucker, who went Instagram official on Valentine’s Day last year (and nobody knew she was even seeing someone in the first place). Countless other celebrities have been “soft” and “hard launching” their relationships as well, like Tom Holland and Zendaya and even (*gasp*) Kim Kardashian and Pete Davidson. Now that Valentine’s Day is almost here, what better way to debut your new boo than on the holiday that’s meant for love? I believe Valentine’s Day is the perfect time to hard launch your relationship. Allow me to explain why.
First, let’s talk about the “soft launch.”
Before getting into why you should hard launch your relationship this February, let’s talk about the “soft launch,” which, in some cases, can be a precursor to officially debuting your relationship online. Let’s say you’ve been seeing someone casually for a while. Then, you take a photo of your elegant dinner plate and your SO’s hands, half their face, or even their shoes — providing a subtle, slightly mysterious hint at the fact that there’s someone special in your life, without revealing who it is. This is a prime example of the “soft launch,” which Urban Dictionary defines as “a photo preview of a ‘talking’ stage before it becomes an official relationship on social media.”
Recently, the “soft launch” process was demonstrated perfectly by TikTok stars Anna Sitar (@annaxsitar) and Kat Stickler (@katstickler), who both teased the reveal of their new boyfriends through a series of TikTok videos — but of course, they didn’t reveal their identities. For months, Anna and Kat’s followers would get a glimpse of a hand moving across the screen or the back of a guy’s head and immediately jump to the comments section to give their guesses on who they were each dating. Eventually, followers guessed correctly: Anna is now dating radio host Josh “Bru” Brubaker, and Kat has been seeing her best friend’s brother, Cam Winter. Post-soft-launch, the two TikTokers are now more open with sharing their respective relationships via social media. The goal of the soft launch is to gradually tease information about who you’re dating, building a sense of anticipation and excitement, then eventually revealing who the lucky person is!
The soft launch may be subtle, but the “hard launch”…not so much.
While a relationship “soft launch” is defined by subtlety and a little mystery, the “hard launch” is the complete opposite. The Cambridge Dictionary defines a “hard launch” as “an occasion when a new product or service is made available to the public, not just a limited number of people, in a way that is intended to attract a lot of attention.” Of course, in this case, that shiny “new product” is your relationship status.
Essentially, “hard launching” is when you’ve barely alluded to the idea that you’ve been dating someone, then you suddenly post a picture of your SO on Instagram — or better yet, a pic of you two together — out of nowhere. The “hard launch” is super clear, ensures that there’s no confusion about the identity of your new boo, and you might even tag the person on social media so people can “Insta stalk” them. (Tagging them in your “hard launch” photo can also be a subtle way to let them know it’s okay to do the same — why not celebrate your new relationship together?!).
Last year, stars like Jennifer Lopez and Adele both chose to “hard launch” their relationships in fun ways; they each posted photo carousels of fire solo shots followed by sweet pictures of their new partners (read: Ben Affleck kissing JLo and Adele with Rich Paul). We may have had to swipe through each carousel for a bit, but it was worth it for the big reveal! The goal of the “hard launch” is to post clear, unmistakable photo evidence that you’re seeing someone. Not only is it exciting, but it’s kind of like when Taylor Swift drops a surprise album — who doesn’t love watching something amazing unfold and sharing the moment online?!
Valentine’s Day is the perfect time to “hard launch” your relationship.
When it comes to debuting a new relationship, hard launching is the ideal attention-grabber — so what better time to do it than on V-Day? If you want to stand out against the many candlelit dinner pics on IG this year, hard launching your relationship is a solid opportunity to create some excitement. You could hypothetically hard launch on any other random day throughout the month, but where’s the fun in that? By posting about your new relationship on Valentine’s Day this year, you’re making a clear statement — plus, you’re getting people thinking and talking about you in the best way. So, don’t be afraid to make you and your partner the stars of the show!
first, “hard launching” Shows Confidence.
If you’re still having doubts about posting, allow me to convince you otherwise. Ideally, you’re confident enough in yourself and in your relationship to post your person without fear of judgment — after all, that’s what makes the hard launch the most fun! If you’re ready to debut your person online but you’re feeling nervous, remember, you don’t need to play it safe by only posting part of someone’s elbow or two wine glasses on the table in an attempt to share that you are, in fact, seeing someone on Valentine’s Day. Hard launching on February 14 not only shows that you’re confident and excited about your new relationship, but the fact that your partner is special enough to make it onto your beautiful, curated and planned-out grid says a lot. Although other people may be posting their SOs on February 14, you’ll stand out with a hard launch post that’s bold in all the right ways. Don’t be afraid to take the leap of faith!
posting your relationship on social media can make it feel more official.
Let’s be clear: Your relationship isn’t dictated by how often you post about each other on social media. However, hard launching on Instagram or TikTok can sometimes symbolize your SO that you’re proud to be seen with them! You want people to know that not only are you in a new relationship, but you’re dating someone special and you’re excited about it. Maybe you thought it was a bit early in your relationship to make it “Insta official” or maybe you already have cute photos together, but you were just waiting for the right time to post them. No matter what your reasoning was for not posting before, hard launching your relationship communicates that you’re serious about this person, and Valentine’s Day can be a fitting day to launch.
The “hard launch” Leaves No Room for Debate.
No guessing. No assuming. No more awkward dates or getting played by dudes like West Elm Caleb. Bestie, you are officially off the market, and deserve to feel confident and happy! While the act of “hard launching” online may seem minor, posting on Valentine’s Day adds a layer of clarity and certainty to your relationship. It may seem intimidating to start a new relationship and debut it on the one holiday dedicated to dating, relationships, and love, but trust me — this can be a super fun way to take the next step in announcing your relationship, loud and clear.
While the “hard launch” can feel like a big milestone, it’s important to remember the people who are closest to you likely aren’t going to find out you have an SO from an Instagram post. No matter how scarce or prominent your social media presence may be, chances are, your closest friends and family will find out about your relationship some way or another, even if it hasn’t existed on social media yet. The hard launch post tends to be more significant for people you aren’t in contact with on a daily basis, or the friends you keep in touch with primarily via social media. At the end of the day, remember that a hard or soft launch post isn’t merely for getting validation from other people; it should be about you feeling good and celebrating this new chapter in your life.
As you gear up for Valentine’s Day this year, you might be wondering: Isn’t everyone going to be posting their significant others online? You may find yourself overthinking the decision or wanting the post to be extra special —and rightfully so! Amidst all the lovey-dovey posts you’re sure to see on the timeline this year, hard launching your new relationship will likely make people stop, like, and interact with your exciting post. You might even get a few texts or DMs along the lines of “I didn’t know you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?!” And get an outpouring of happiness and support from friends, family, and your followers. Bingo.
Valentine’s Day is approaching fast, so what are you waiting for? Hard launching your relationship on V-Day not only strengthens your Insta game, but it will inevitably boost excitement and intrigue about your dating life as well. You’re proud to be seen with your partner and you want everyone to know just how confident you are with this person, so why not share how great they are with the world? On a holiday that’s all about love, it’ll be clear where your heart is at when you choose to “hard launch.” So, start planning that date, make that dinner reservation, get all dolled up for the 14th, have a mini photo shoot with your boo, and post your heart out on Instagram, TikTok, or wherever you choose to “hard launch.” Just be sure to put the phone down when the yummy chocolate and roses arrive and enjoy some sweet quality time with your person.