I started therapy a couple weeks ago and honestly, I am so grateful to have started it. I am not saying that everyone needs therapy, but I do think that everyone can benefit from it. We as humans have grown accustomed to living life on our screens without taking a couple of seconds to process our thoughts, while also constantly working to survive in this capitalistic society. I can also understand that some people may not be able to afford it and how there are alternatives to receiving therapy in the meantime.Â
I realized I needed therapy when I would have constant nightmares; including ones where my childhood dog died and me getting kidnapped in the store. It was terrifying to wake up in a state of panic and wonder if I was even okay. When I searched up what these dreams meant, it gave me multiple interpretations but the main thing VeryWell Mind said was, “If these dreams continue, consider talking to a licensed professional.” That was the unfortunate wake up call I needed.
I had always wanted therapy because I knew that my way of thinking wasn’t healthy and I needed to talk to someone about my problems, because I felt like I was burdening everybody. I know now that I am not burdening the people I trust, but it certainly felt like it. I wanted someone that would tell me I f*ed up but who also understands what language to use to make me see the error in my ways. I am also very anxious: I am always worrying about something, which is why I feel like I don’t need caffeine to function properly. The anxiety keeps me awake and it allows me to perform relatively well throughout the day. Before bed, I am exhausted and either fall asleep in seconds or am restless.Â
A day after I had searched up the interpretations, I made an appointment with Counseling and Psychiatric Services (CAPS) to get a screening. The person at CAPS told me that based on the generalized anxiety disorder test, it would be recommended I look for a therapist that I can meet with once a week. My main concern was looking for a therapist that understood my cultural background so when the counseling person asked me what would be my preferences for a therapist, I was relieved. I asked for someone that was female identifying, a person of color, and accepted my insurance.Â
After contacting two therapists, the second one reached out and I was able to schedule a meeting with her. She asked me questions like why do I think I need therapy and what is my end goal. After stating I’d like to calm my anxiety, while also finding better coping mechanisms, she seemed like she knew exactly what to do. And since then, I’ve been regularly meeting with her. I really appreciate her approach to therapy and I feel like it has changed my life in such a simple way. Which is why I believe everyone should start therapy. Contributing 50 minutes one day of the week does a lot, and I even find myself looking forward to it.
I can’t tell if I have had much difference within myself; this may be something where I need months of consistency to see a difference. All I know is that I am happy to have someone that will listen without judgement while also providing insight.