Most mornings, I wake up with a surge of anxiety. Even on a day where I have only one or two things going on, it feels like there is still so much to do. Homework assignments are always looming over my head, along with tests, quizzes, club meetings I have to attend, and various responsibilities.Â
College life can get so turbulent. Most people are involved in clubs or organizations along with classes, and some people have jobs that they have to fit into their already jam-packed schedules. Even juggling just a few things is tough, especially when you add in time management, deadlines, and the pressure to perform at your best.
If you resonated with any of that, I feel you. This semester has been the most challenging for me, as I transition from a freshman year filled with Gen-Eds and minor commitments to a sophomore year that includes major classes and extracurricular activities that require a significant amount of time from me.
There have been days when I’ve let all of these things consume me, get in my head, and hinder my ability to keep working towards my goals. If you’ve felt similarly recently, let me pose you this question: When was the last time you did something just for yourself?
Burnout is so real in college. If you’ve ever been burnt out, you might have felt constantly exhausted, had no motivation, consistent irritability, and maybe even disconnected from yourself.
The worst part is how normalized overworking ourselves has become. How many times have you heard your peers brag about their all-nighters, how reliant they are on caffeine, or how jam-packed their schedules are? Probably all too many times to count.Â
The problem is that we’ve, as students, curated a certain productivity culture that makes us feel guilty for resting. But the truth is that self-care is necessary for you to operate at your highest level.
Think of yourself as a coffee pot. There are hundreds of cups of different sizes around you. The largest one is your cup. But the smaller cups are labeled things like friends, clubs, and school. Your first instinct will probably be to pour into all of these smaller cups. But once you finally get to your cup, you’ll be all out of coffee.
You need to fill your own cup. If you’re always pouring into others and your responsibilities, you’re going to run dry. That’s what burnout is.
I learned this metaphor over the summer when I served as a First Year Orientation Guide. One of the Assistant Directors hammered it into our heads during training, and it stuck with me. We were working long days during Weeks of Welcome, moving students in on 90-degree days, then running students from event to event. On the first day, my step count was over 30,000. I was so exhausted, but I had to reset my approach of overworking myself and not taking a break. I realized that if I didn’t slow down, I wouldn’t last the week, let alone the semester.
Filling my cup during Weeks of Welcome looked like showering between events, decompressing with my friends on the team, and making sure I ate full meals and got full nights of sleep. Doing all of that gave me energy that I could give back to my team, my students, and allowed me to be prompt and on my A-Game.Â
I take the “cup” metaphor with me everywhere now. Every time a new task gets added to my never-ending list, my first reaction is to get stressed, and I quickly let it overwhelm me. But grounding myself and realizing how important it is to take care of myself always helps.
Self-care isn’t selfish, as much as it might be ingrained in your head that it is; it’s necessary. In the end, taking care of yourself will help with your levels of focus, balancing of emotions, and nourish your relationships.
Another analogy I like is the “oxygen mask” analogy. On a plane, the safety instruction is that in an emergency, you need to secure your mask before going to help others secure theirs. If you don’t put your mask on first, you risk your own life. You need to prioritize yourself and replenish your time and energy to give them to other people.
Dealing with the stressors of life looks different for everyone. I like to read, color, take a nap, or call people I love to talk it through, like my mom or my best friend. Sometimes I even take a self-care night too.
You might not know where to begin in filling your own cup. You could start with setting aside time every day to do something fun, taking a walk or exercising to clear your head, or spending time with people that you love. A super important thing to remember is that it’s okay to say no to things when your plate is a little too full.
Every time that life feels like it’s taking hits at you, I encourage you to refrain from hitting back. Take a step back, ground yourself, and start viewing self-care as maintenance, not a luxury. It’s necessary to ensure that you’re operating from a place of stability. Taking care of yourself will give you that, making you stronger, not weaker, not just in school but in your daily life. Remember: you can’t pour from an empty cup. Your best self shows up when you’re cared for — by you