Source: Carl Attard
Since grade 9, I have always dealt with problems with my self-confidence. Everyone has their moments when they are too shy to take a picture or judge their physical appearance based on celebrities and others around them. For me, it was hard to put myself out there during high school. I always thought to myself that no one would like who I am. I was so hard on myself that I prevented myself from going out and meeting new people between grade 9 and 10. My anxiety had a lot to do with my self confidence. From grade 11 till now, I figured out my own way to love who I am no matter what anybody says.
Everyone has their own way of building their self-confidence. It took me a while; learning was a slow process. First, I told myself everyday that God made all of us different, so we shouldn’t try to be like one another. Being different from others is what makes our world unique. Another way I built my self confidence is by always thinking about the ones who truly love me for the woman I am. My friends and family all love the person I have grown to become and for that I believed that I shouldn’t change who I am.
The biggest challenge I had to deal with was questioning why I never had a boyfriend in high school. It was hard for me to not tell myself that I wasn’t beautiful or pretty enough for any guy that was around me. Unfortunately, I had to realize my self worth right after high school. I made myself believe that someone will find me beautiful one day.
Anxiety made it worse for me to perform well in school. It got worse when I started university. I got one terrible grade first year of university and now that I think about it, I reacted very dramatically. Many people that I have talked to who have gotten bad grades in university or college, just brushed it off and did better on the next exam or assignment. My reaction to bad grades made me drop out of university when I was 19. I went back home to attend St. Clair College in hopes to redeem myself. I started college believing that I couldn’t do well in post-secondary, but, I knew that I had to prove my doubt wrong. I finished my two year program at St. Clair with a 4.0 GPA. Now, I am at York working my hardest to finish my undergrad in Psychology. Some people in my shoes wouldn’t go back to university, but after graduating from college, I finally believed that I could do anything. I shouldn’t let one bad year in my past ruin my future.
I know for some of you, it might be hard to believe that you can achieve anything. I promise you that one bad day in your life does not determine your future. Loving yourself should always come first. Remember, whatever you want to be in life CAN happen. We are all on this earth for many reasons, and if you put your mind to something, remarkable things can happen. It took me a long time to believe that, and today I am happy with the woman I have become.
Always believe in yourself, never doubt your capabilities. People come and go, but the ones who were meant to be in your life will stay. Someone will love you and cherish you and know your worth. Always be kind to yourself. Make it a hobby to always remind yourself how amazing you are. Be around people who cherish you and are always looking forward to being around you. You deserve to feel loved!