As young women striving to be brilliant at rigorous colleges, it is in our innate instinct to compare ourselves to our peers. As we traverse this journey of self-discovery through a sense of newfound independence, insecurity seems to be an inevitable emotion that we all drown in. The question “Am I doing this right?” never seems to have a clear answer. The compulsion to satisfy society’s expectations of how we are supposed to act, to meet the GPAs we are expected to achieve and to associate with the kinds of boys we are supposed to can lead to unnecessary self-doubt.You know what? You will never be perfect — and that’s a good thing.
Trust me, I had my own, stress-induced breakdown this week when I realized this article was four days overdue. I also did substantially lower than the curve on an exam I took the same week. I tore into myself about it all day; but then, I asked myself: would I ever treat my best friend struggling in the same situation this way? Absolutely not. So why am I calling myself stupid? Why am I obsessing over everything I did wrong in the past and overlooking the fact that I’ve had major successes this semester that outweigh the bad moments?
When it comes to college — and life in general — we need to realize we will suck at some things. The people around us may seem to have it all together, but they don’t. No one really knows what they’re doing. Friends, classmates, parents and professors all have their own struggles — and that’s okay. We don’t need to be perfect, we need to be happy. Learn to be your own best friend, and learn to be gentle and supportive with yourself. That doesn’t make you weak, that makes you smart.
So don’t expect to get a 4.0, have a six pack, never break out, get enough sleep and feel happy all the time. Do your best to appreciate what you have done, and remember that your friends and family will always do the same.