It is almost that time of year again where everything seems to be catching up to us and there just simply aren’t enough hours in the day to get everything done. Christmas is coming up, there are birthdays to buy for, bills to pay and if you’re a student, then all of your assignments and readings are starting to pile up. This is the time of year when people start to become anxious and overwhelmed in their daily lives. We begin to feel like we have lost control over the things happening around us and it can be scary. If it’s left alone for too long, it can even lead you to that dreadful burnt-out feeling.
It can be tricky to recognize when you or someone you know is overwhelmed because what it looks and feels like often varies from person to person. It may appear as a lack of focus or not knowing what to do next. It could also appear as someone not wanting to do anything due to the fact that they feel like the tasks are impossible now and there’s no point in trying. If you’re like me, however, it likely will take the form of tiredness, irritability and a lack of patience altogether. The point I am making here is that the feeling of being overwhelmed has many faces and it can be tricky to detect and even trickier to overcome.
So then how do we overcome being overwhelmed? The first thing I would suggest doing is taking a step back and asking yourself what it is that you need right now. Don’t focus on the expectations that others might have of you or what you know needs to be done. Take a deep breath and ask yourself, what do I need right now? It could be stepping back and taking a few deep breaths, walking away from the work to get some water or maybe you just need a short break to compose your thoughts.
Once you have taken that step back, you should take a minute to reflect on how you have been treating yourself lately. Have you been eating enough, getting enough sleep, talking and communicating with those around you? I want you to think of one step you can take to address and adjust at least one of the imbalances in your life. Maybe this means you are going to start getting up a little earlier so that you actually eat breakfast. This could mean that you are going to start going to bed at a certain time every night, regardless of what work may still be left to do. Commit to taking one step at a time, and slowly adjust the imbalances so that you can begin to overcome the overwhelming feelings that are crowding your brain.
When you begin to take action over your life, to change and adjust aspects of your life, you will start to feel like you have some control again. You may begin to feel that the overwhelming feelings are not controlling your life as much as they once did. Once you begin recognizing that you have too much on your plate, you can stop feeling as though you have to say yes to every request. You can begin to honour your boundaries by saying no instead. It is important to remember that you’re not obliged to explain yourself for not being able to do something for someone. More importantly, it doesn’t make you a bad or selfish person for not doing it. It only means that you are acknowledging that you have a limited amount of time and energy and need to focus it on yourself and the things that matter to you.
Finally, if you think you need help, please don’t be afraid to ask for it. It can be difficult to acknowledge when we need help and asking for it can be even more difficult. We don’t want to appear weak to others, but the truth is that it’s quite the opposite. Asking for help is an indicator of strength. Begin to look for the areas that you need support in and start there. Maybe this means talking to a financial advisor or it could be a date with your partner to open up about how you feel, maybe they can help you. Opening up and asking for help is not a sign of weakness, although that is a popular stigma. We need to begin confidently asking for help when we need it.
Trying to tackle the overwhelming feelings on our own and all at once is a lot to handle for anyone. So, my advice is to begin by acknowledging how you feel. Make sure you ask for support when you need it and find those small steps that you can take to help you gradually get back to feeling calm, present and in charge of your own life.