One of my favorite speakers/ folks that share their thoughts about the nature of life is Alan Watts. I know him from the segments of his talks I am able to find on Youtube, though I remember a professor of mine telling the class that he had quite the life. He passed away peacefully in his sleep in the 70’s of a heart condition, but during his life he introduced people to philosophies from all corners of the globe and presented them in such a simplistic, soothing ways in his talks. Much of the basis of his talks have roots in Taoism, an eastern spiritual practice with a basis in mindfulness and following the Tao, or natural flow of the universe. One of my favorite talks from him was one about fear, the ways we hold ourselves back, and the why. Alan Watts seems to be an individual who values bravery and self-actualization in some form but, you do not need to be a scholar or a philosopher to resonate with the ideas he presents. There is a quote I find myself thinking of often when I feel stressed: “Its all a show.”, the context of this quote was about the feelings of fear and anxiety. I know those feelings well and maybe you do too, the philosophy he brings to fear and worry is that it is a show, much like when you go to the movies to be scared or excited or to laugh. Most often, the things we are afraid of never happen, and often times the things we want the most are the scariest to us.
But where does that leave you, the person coping with the worry and the stress? Well, he supposes that it is a part of it all, of life and doing things that scare you shows you that perhaps you did not need to worry so much at all. Worry and stress in life is inevitable, but that does not mean that life is any less beautiful or less safe to live. He goes on saying that worry is like an onion: if you are financially unstable you will worry about that, if you are financially stable you will worry about your health, and if not your health then something else and so on, he goes down the list. Each time you peel back a layer there is always worry if you choose it. For those of us who have a hard time with choosing not to worry, sometimes it can seem like there is no choice, When things get hard our perspective is blurred by worry and doubt and we feel it, but at the end of the day there is beauty in doing it anyway.
Sitting with the worry and telling yourself that it is okay and that it will likely continue to be okay in the future may seem simple minded, but maybe some answers just are, those are usually the trickiest ones to remember personally. I like to think we exist on this planet to experience life, even the hard parts, and learning to laugh through them is a hard-earned skill. This does not mean that worry is avoidable; your worry is there to protect you from possible danger/embarrassment/etc, and you do not have to escape it or suppress it. Treat it like a visitor, be gentle with it and allow it to teach you more about yourself. Try to sit with it like a friend as opposed to your enemy. This takes practice and you likely will not always be able to, but when you can you find that it is not useless- quite the opposite I have come to realize. All emotions exist to help you and sometimes, yes, it gets a little out of hand. However, if you look deeper at why you are stressed in the first place and what the stress is trying to tell you, you can begin to sort it out, and remind yourself that you can do it even when you are scared. The knowledge that “its all a show” and we can strive through our biggest fears is empowering and soft all at once. If you want a little more of that empowering and soft life philosophy with your morning cup, maybe Alan Watt’s talks could help you too.
P.S. we are almost at the end of the school semester, hang in there!