I always get so much crap for how much I talk about and preach the words of Dr. Phillip Mcgraw, but after watching 18 seasons of his show I can confirm I have learned many life lessons and gotten lots of advice to live my life by. Here’s a list of the top pieces of advice I’ve collected form Dr. Phil from the past 18 seasons of his show:
Hindsight is 2020
Yes, this is listed first in the spirit of the new year, woohoo 2020! Hindsight is 2020 means its always easy to see the past experiences with more clarity and sense after they are over. We may wonder, how did I not see that before? How did I not see the red flags? The obvious answer? Well, its much easier to think that way after you’ve received a solution and are outside of the box. Don’t beat down on yourself for not seeing the answers then that you do now. If anything, learn from your mistakes and let them help you gain earlier insight in the future.
You Can’t Change What You Don’t Acknowledge
This is one of my favorite pieces of advice Dr. Phil has given. If there is a problem in your life, the only way to get rid of it is to actively acknowledge that there is a problem, and work through methods to find a solution. You cannot expect an ongoing or suppressed issue in your life to magically solve itself without taking it head on.
No Matter How Flat You Make a Pancake, It Always Has Two Sides
This quote is often used when Dr. Phil is dealing with people who have two opposing versions of a story. Someone said the event happened like this, and someone else says it happened like this. The point is, everyone perceives things differently, and a person’s perception is their reality. We trust ourselves and our own judgement, meaning whatever we think we saw or heard, we believe it.
Someday Is Not A Day of The Week
Ever have any dreams or goals that you want to pursue that you keep pushing off because you’ll get to it… someday? Well as Dr. Phil has pointed out, “someday” is NOT a day of the week. Dreams are fantasies that we keep in our head, about things we might do, about things we might achieve. But our dreams can become reality if we turn them into goals. The difference between a dream and a goal is a timeline. If you truly want something in your life, the best way to get it is to set a timeline with goals in it to keep you accountable, and to bring your visions to life by realistically thinking about how you get from here to there.
We Believe the Things We Tell Ourselves
This is a simple and true piece of advice that applies to every single person of any walk of life. Our brains are incredibly powerful, and believes the things we tell them. A big way to help you achieve those goals (NOT dreams!) that we talked about earlier is to tell yourself you are capable and worthy of achieving them. If you continuously tell yourself that you are not worthy or are not good enough to accomplish your goals, then you will do just that. When you give yourself limitations you are setting yourself up for failure. But if you tell yourself that you are capable, that you are beautiful, that you are worthy, that you are smart, etc., the repetition will settle into your brain and make that something you eventually truly believe. Do not allow yourself to fall into the pessimistic mindset that you are not able to achieve what you set your mind to because that is what separates you from the people who obtain what they want in life, and those who don’t.
We Teach People How to Treat Us
This is one of the most valuable pieces of advice I have picked up from watching Dr. Phil, and it speaks true to everyone. In our lives, we set the standard for how others are allowed to treat us. When you don’t speak up about something you aren’t comfortable with, or you allow someone to repeatedly take advantage of you and do nothing, you are showing them that it is okay for you to be treated without respect. Now for the people who lack respect for you whether you address your concerns or not, this leads to the last piece of advice…
Not Everyone You Lose Is A Loss
Sometimes, it is healthy to cut ties and move on. It can be so easy to allow a person to stay in your life when they have been in it for so long or have previously had a positive impact. But people change, or more likely, eventually reveal their true colors. Try to determine if you are holding on to a relationship because of who that person presently is, or because of who they were, or the idea of them. Letting a toxic person go can be a healthy and relieving process that helps you move forward and find people who are more beneficial to your life. If you are feeling torn about letting someone go, think about if you have both genuinely tried to fix your relationship, and if you have but nothing has changed, it may be time to move on.
I hope these few pieces of advice are helpful and assist you in gaining insight into how to continue this new year with a confident and adaptable mindset, and if you would like to hear more advice… Dr. Phil is on every weekday at 4pm.