The other night, I was scrolling Reddit and came across a post asking, “Why are third places disappearing?” I obviously clicked on the post because it was something I’ve wondered before, but the more I read the comments, I realized that third places aren’t exactly “disappearing,” but we kind of just stopped going to them for a variety of reasons.
What even is a third place anyway?
A third place is somewhere that isn’t our home (the first place) or work/school (the second place). It’s where we spend our free time and relax outside of the home and our jobs. Third places can be things like cafes, libraries, gyms/recreation centers, bars, parks, malls, stores, community centers, and religious centers. But these things still exist, so why does it feel like they don’t?Â
Everything is expensive or restricted
It used to be so that you and your friends could walk into a coffee shop, get a hot mocha, sit in big comfy chairs, and just yap, and it would be a cheap little hangout. Nowadays, it’s expensive to even get a simple latte, and the workers expect you to leave as soon as possible. Barnes & Noble used to have areas to sit and lounge around in stores, which have been replaced with more things to buy. It also doesn’t help that everything seems like you HAVE to spend your money on something while you’re out. You can’t really hang around a lot of public spaces for longer than a few minutes without it being considered “loitering”. Back then, kids and teens would walk around the neighborhood or stroll around the mall without parental supervision. Nowadays, malls have started banning teenagers who are there without adult supervision, and parents are so suspicious of others that they have stopped letting their kids go to their friends’ houses or be a little more free-range.
On top of our coffee and the other things we buy, the cost of keeping up with existing third places has also become more expensive. Libraries have shorter hours because it costs money to stay open, and with fewer patrons, there’s no reason for them to stay open as long. Creating and occupying commercial spaces used to be much cheaper, but now that’s no longer the case, as there are so many guidelines to follow, which makes maintaining or replacing current spaces more expensive.
COVID-19
After the pandemic, many stores and public places began to close early or limit hours. Additionally, many people work remotely, especially after COVID, which can further isolation. I find that our social lives have become less active as a result of COVID, which has also led people to live their social lives online rather than going out.
Since the pandemic taught us that we can survive without leaving our houses, many people choose to stay living that way. And sometimes these same people complain that there aren’t third places left, when they kind of brought the problem onto themselves.
Social Media & The Internet
People are lonelier and more socially isolated than ever, and social media and the internet as a whole are a huge factor. It’s as though social media and online spaces are the new designated “third places”. So much of our life has moved online: getting food and necessities, socializing, work, school, hobbies, you name it. Everything someone could want is just a tap on the screen away. We robbed ourselves of human connection for distraction.
The internet drastically reduces our in-person interactions with people, which can also lead us to think that people are more dangerous than we are. This causes us to assume the worst about random people and keep distance from people who aren’t in our curated bubbles.Â
People are “busy”
It seems like everyone is oh so busy to do anything, right? Well, it’s probably half true. As college students, it could be possible that they’re swamped with schoolwork and other duties, like clubs/organizations, jobs, and taking care of themselves. Americans are now in survival mode, having started taking up second or third jobs to make ends meet, lessening their free time. Life in the US is so rushed, and the days go by so fast, while in some other countries, days go more slowly, and people have more breathing room to socialize. Having free time might not mean having available time. After working all day and doing chores, some people might just want to be alone and have their own company.
But there’s no way EVERYONE is just trying to survive. As stated before, online spaces are basically the new third places, and so many people just spend their free time doomscrolling on Instagram, TikTok, Reddit, or whatever space they’re on. Some people just aren’t as busy as they say they are; they’re just consumed by technology. And then there’s the harsh truth: some people just don’t want to interact with anyone else, which is also partially the fault of technology.
Third places haven’t disappeared as much as they’ve been neglected. Despite everything, people still want a third place; it’s just that everything is so expensive now, and people also don’t have the motivation to try and maintain already-existing third places. Now, thinking back on that Reddit post, I realized that everything is still there; we just stopped going for various reasons, both within and out of our control. At the end, it’s also a choice that we made, and we can still choose to bring back these places as much as we can.