When I first started therapy in my junior year of high school, I thought it was the most embarrassing thing in the world. Like, less embarrassing than being the theatre kid that I also was. So naturally, I lied about it. When I left school early to get to my therapist’s office, I told my friends I had started going to an internship. An internship that was twice a week for a year. I was so embarrassed that I had brought myself to get the help I needed. But it shouldn’t be this way.
Therapy doesn’t have to be a secret possession you lock away in a coded safe. Therapy is yours, and you can do whatever you want with it. For me, I eventually learned that hiding therapy was doing the farthest thing from helping me. In fact, it was stunting my growth as a person, which was quite literally the opposite goal of therapy for me. It wasn’t until I heard one of my favorite celebrities talk about her experiences in therapy that I felt less alone. When I finally told my best friend the truth, that I had been in therapy for a year (not some made-up internship), the biggest weight was lifted off my shoulders. I realized that all of my fears of people treating me differently and having a “handle with care” label printed across my forehead were irrational. Of course, my friends wanted to know if I was okay — it’s only natural — but then, we continued on as if the elephant in the room had shrunk, or maybe disappeared completely.
Now, as a sophomore in college, my therapy journey has changed drastically. I think that it’s important to note that this is normal; as you grow and change, so does therapy. While I started counseling as a way to deal with depression, it also helped me through an eating disorder, and today it helps me manage my anxiety. Overall, I’ve had two amazing therapists, and they’ve each provided me with a different experience. However, their goal is always the same: helping me better my everyday life, which is nothing to be ashamed of.
Being more open about therapy has only benefited my growth. I never want anyone to feel like I did as a junior in high school — that therapy was embarrassing and shameful. Because of this, I try to talk more openly about my experiences. Usually, this happens pretty naturally, as I mention that “I can’t go to Target, I have therapy at 3,” or “I forgot to reschedule with my therapist.” While these sentences may seem simple, it’s taken me quite some time to get here.
As my favorite laptop sticker says, “Therapy is Cool,” and by being open and honest about it, I hope that fewer people feel that it’s something to hide. Whether you go to therapy, have gone in the past, or want to begin counseling, I encourage you to share your experiences. You never know how much it might help others going through the same thing.