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This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at UCD chapter.

Something I’ve struggled with for most of my younger years was learning how to ask other people for help, even when I really need it. In the society that we live in today, it’s so hard to be vulnerable and open with someone, it’s difficult to rely on another person. We become so obsessed with independence that we lose ourselves in believing that we can accomplish everything alone. I value independence so much that I can forget to let others in, and sometimes that can make everyone involved feel isolated. I could do it all alone… but why should I have to? We want to be needed, and it’s innate for us to want help.

 It’s naive to think that you have all the answers, after all, you’re just one person. Although you have so many powerful ideas to give to the world, so does everyone else. So why is it so hard to ask someone for help when you’re struggling? Opening up to someone else for help actually brings you closer, and allows you to both feel more connected since it teaches you both that it’s okay to depend on each other. That feeling of understanding you can depend on another person is so important for a healthy, secure relationship of any realm.

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Photo by Brooke Cagle from Unsplash

We’re all struggling, especially right now, and I’m sure a lot of us have wanted to ask someone for help at one point. It can be scary to feel that you need help, and even scarier to be able to communicate that. However, it’s necessary to be able to communicate those emotions and be open to receiving that help and love. I know a lot of the times I fear that I will be left disappointed, that if you communicate your emotions and what you need from someone they might let you down. It’s important that you still open yourself up to that rejection, or you’ll never receive the warmth from the help that someone could give.

In different situations, it’s common to fight the urge to ask for help. When you’re confused or need clarification, it can be difficult to own up to your feelings in that moment. It’s so easy to talk yourself into isolation, but if you don’t ask for help, you stay stuck. Deep down, we all would rather grow than be stuck in a situation needing help. But our ego gets stuck, and we choke as we ask for a lending hand to help us out of our isolation. Whenever you feel ready, it’s okay to reach out to the people in your life for help. You can be independent, but you don’t have to tackle life all by yourself.

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Photo by Priscilla Du Preez from Unsplash

Abby is a fourth year at the University of California, Davis majoring in Human Development and Psychology. She enjoys music, spending time with friends, the outdoors, and writing.
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