I used to feel like I always needed someone to do something with. If my friends were busy or nobody had plans, I would usually just stay home. I think a lot of that comes from being in college, where it seems like everyone is always doing something. It’s easy to feel like you’re missing out when you see your friends going out or making plans without you. But lately, I’ve realized that I don’t mind having days to myself as much as I used to.
It took me a while to get comfortable doing things alone. For some reason, going somewhere by yourself can feel really weird at first. You almost feel like people are going to wonder why you’re alone, even though most people probably don’t really notice or care. But once you get past that feeling, you realize it’s really not a big deal. You can still go get coffee, randomly walk around downtown, or do something you’ve been wanting to do without having to find someone to come with you.
I think one of the biggest things I’ve learned is that I don’t want to miss out on things just because nobody else is available. If I want to go somewhere, I should be able to go. It sounds simple, but it’s something I think a lot of us struggle with, especially when we’re so used to doing everything with friends. That doesn’t mean I don’t love spending time with other people. I still look forward to making plans with my friends, and some of my favorite memories from college involve the people I’ve met here. But I’ve also learned that I don’t need to have plans every weekend to enjoy myself. Sometimes I’d rather stay in and not feel like I need to be somewhere else.
As a senior, I think I’ve become more aware of how much things are going to change after graduation. My friends and I won’t always live close to each other or have the same schedules. We won’t be able to make last-minute plans as easily as we can now. I think that’s made me appreciate having a good relationship with myself, too. I don’t want my ability to enjoy my life to depend on whether someone else is around. I also think there’s a difference between being alone and being lonely. You can have a great group of friends and still enjoy having time to yourself. In fact, I think having that time makes it easier to appreciate the time you do spend with other people.
I’m not saying you should turn down plans or stop making an effort to see your friends. But I do think there’s something to be said for being able to make your own plans and enjoy them, even if nobody comes along. You don’t always need someone else there to have a good time. Sometimes you just have to get comfortable doing things for yourself.