About a year ago, I was the most stressed I’d ever been in my life. Between college applications, senior year, and a busy work schedule, I had a lot going on – too much. Around this point, I stumbled across a phrase online: “treat yourself.” I was willing to follow any advice given on “Parks and Rec.” The self-care movement seemed to revolve around face masks, scented candles, and impulse buys. As someone who was struggling to stay sane, the message was appealing. If I spent a little time devoted to self-care, my stress would disappear, and I’d be left a constant optimistic mentality.
A few months later, my excitement had faded to disillusionment. Overuse of (expensive!) face masks dried out my skin, and I ate ice cream too often, telling myself I deserved it after a long day. Binging on Netflix because I thought I had earned a break left me scrambling to do homework late at night and last minute. My idea of self-care had left me worse off than I was before, but this experience also taught me how to truly take care of myself.
Treating yourself in the short term can sometimes harm you in the long-term. Real self-care isn’t just about taking a few minutes to relax; truly taking care of yourself is much more difficult, but it’s undoubtedly worth the extra effort. There’s a whole industry built around self-care, but there’s so many free and easy ways to find balance in life and reduce stress. Getting enough sleep, catching up with an old friend, taking a yoga class, reading, and walking your dog are all great ways to practice self-care. Exercise and meditation are also great ways to improve your mental and physical well-being. True self-care is anything you choose to do because it makes you happy and relaxed, whether that be watching your favorite movie, painting your nails, or taking a hike.
Self-care also involves making life changes when your stress level is too high. If you’re unhappy with some aspect of your life, there aren’t enough face masks in the world to fix that. You need to consider fixing the deeper causes of your anxiety. For me, I needed to seriously reevaluate how I was spending my time and think about what really made me happy. It’s so important to find balance and build a life that makes you happy.
There’s a time and a place for the marketing industry’s definition of self-care. I still love a nice face mask from time to time. But if you find yourself relying on the “treat yourself” mantra to stay sane, then you should think about how you can treat the root cause of your stress instead of using superficial fixes.
And remember that although it’s so important to be frivolous and spontaneous from time to time, you shouldn’t sacrifice your long-term goals for short-term moments of joy. Find a balance between eating healthy and enjoying some sweets. If you really love something, then buy it, but don’t go overboard all the time. True self-care isn’t about a momentary endorphin rush; it’s about taking care of yourself so you’re happy now and in the future.