Sometimes, I just feel like life is too much to handle. We all need a break every now and then, from all of the decisions and mental chaos, and to be able to take a minute to clear our minds and reset.
I have been dealing with a lot alone, and I bet many others have as well. This is one of those moments when you tell yourself, “I just gotta trust the universe,” simply because there is no one else left to put my trust in. Things in our lives feel chaotic and just plain overwhelming, so sometimes we need to surrender and learn to trust that things will work out.
Sometimes, trust is really an art form on it’s own. Especially in those moments when it feels like you’re working hard and things just aren’t going your way. In our world, we put so much emphasis on the importance of letting go, giving up on the need to control, and just learning to trust that things will work themselves out. A dream job will just appear one day, as well as the perfect partner and heaps of money. But trusting the universe also requires a certain level of patience, as things will not happen immediately and results can take years. Unfortunately, patience has always been something I lack. I’ve never been able to sit still in the waiting room of a blood work lab, when I knew in the next couple of minutes I was going to have a needle sticking out of my arm. I never had any patience waiting for friends to come pick me up, sitting there in anxious fits, thinking about every bad possibility that could have occurred. I never had any patience waiting for AP tests I had to take in two weeks, just wishing for the time to move by faster because I couldn’t wait for it to be over.
But this is something I’ve needed to learn, and have been trying to teach myself, although, it is hard during a time when being independent is really all we can be right now. So until both you and I can efficiently get to a place of trust, let me be a replacement. A temporary substitute while you learn that you can do this all on your own.
1. Realize that no matter how much you want to just sit there and let the world play itself out…. it won’t.
Often times I sit and read a book or listen to music. Now that’s fine and all, that’s actually great, unless it’s done for hours and hours on end, and you have things you need to be doing. Too often, when I get caught up in thinking that I need to “trust the universe,” I somehow think an external force is going to swoop into my life and save me from all the challenges I am experiencing. This way of trust is not a reality, but a fantasy. Acting like Rapunzel stuck in a tower, waiting for her prince to come and save her will not get you where you want to be. Because in reality, Rapunzel could have just climbed down by herself all along.
2. Learn to let go of the idea that things will work themselves out without any contribution on your part.
Trusting the universe isn’t about hoping that things will just work out. Despite knowing that it will, it still doesn’t give you a free pass to sit back and do nothing. It’s about being practical, about approaching your fears head on and learning what you need to let go of. Time and time again, I find myself hung up the on ways I can continue to hide or ways I can avoid stepping up. Excuses like, “I have plenty of time to get this done, let me go take a nap instead.” I think the reason I held on to these excuses and false ideas are because of the notion that I might have to take responsibility to get the life that I want. I’d have to take responsibility for my success, my future, and for every time I claimed “I have more time.” No more excuses. Its scary, but when your desire for the life you want outweighs that of staying in your comfort zone, you can achieve big things.
3. The universe will serve you but not always please you.
Sometimes I fantasize about magically getting my wish. Without any work on my part, whatever I need will come easy to me. Whether it be a good grade on a test, or even just having a simple conversation with someone, it will just come. But that’s until I ask myself if that would actually serve me. Would receiving that perfect grade or great conversation, without working for it, really help me gain confidence in my own abilities? Probably not. It’ll serve me to know that I am intrinsically determined to succeed, facing every fear in my life with the universe at my back. I can get out of this tower myself, thank you very much.
4. Sometimes, you get the opposite of what you want… and that okay.
Not getting what you want can be the greatest gift. This is especially true if what I wanted was the easy way out. I know this, as I have a long-standing affair with wanting the easy way out; with hoping someone or something else would take care of everything for me. And to be honest, they often did. But this dynamic was fruitless. Even without stepping up, I still found myself anxious and stressed. Depending on other people to take care of my life for me left me feeling dependent with no trust in my own innate abilities and strengths. You need to be able to step up and take charge of your own life. That way, you know that everything will be okay on your own.
5. Trust yourself.
The best way to trust the universe is to have trust in yourself. Get curious about what is specifically preventing you from stepping up. Is it the excuses? The procrastination? The insecurities? Whatever it may be, let go of that specific thought or assumption. Know that the universe has a plan and everything that happens falls according to it. Even if that doesn’t please you, it’s alright because sometimes not getting what we want is even better.
All images are courtesy of Her Campus Media