Originally, this article was supposed to be a look into my daily life, kind of like a day in my life, but then I started writing about my experience climbing a rock wall and sillily enough it seemed to have more of an impact on me than I thought and I learned a lesson or two about myself because of it, so I thought I’d share the lesson I learned as it might be insightful for others.
My Experience
On Wednesday, Feb 24. I was too tired to go to the gym and strength train like I usually do, so I decided to take a group class called “Human Pilates Reformer” at the Student Recreation Center. It was fun and challenging and I have never done it before. Anyway, I was too tired to work out after the class, but my friend wanted to work out, so I decided I was going to try the climbing wall for the second time.
The last time that I tried climbing that rock wall was when I was a freshman, about three years ago. Now, for those who haven’t seen the rock wall at the rec, I don’t know exactly how tall it is, but what I do know, is that the rec is three stories tall and the rock wall reaches all the way up to the ceiling…Right. So, last time I did the rock wall, I was not necessarily confident in myself or ready to do it, especially considering that I have a fear of heights, but I just did it anyway. I made it about halfway up before giving up. I don’t remember why I gave up, but I think I have an idea of why after my most recent experience with it.
This Time Around
I was really pumped and confident in myself when I attempted the wall this time around. The person who was giving me the orientation and watching over me to make sure I was safe was really supportive and prepared me. I dressed in the harness and climbing shoes, double-checked that everything was snug, and I felt good and ready to start. I did the easiest course and was making time in the first half.Â
So, I started climbing that wall. I was doing really well, and then, I got halfway. The same spot I reached before giving up last time. My fingers started shaking and getting numb, my forearms were on fire, and the rocks seemed to be too far for me to reach. Uh-oh, I started to panic. The person watching me told me to take a break, so I hung there for a few seconds. I tried closing my hands into fists, and I genuinely couldn’t do it. My hands were numb. My friend and the mentor told me I could keep going, but that wasn’t helping, because by then I was already done. So, despite my original plan, I gave up halfway. Again.Â
Hear me out, obviously, I didn’t want to give up. I wanted to make it all the way to the top. But once I looked down and realized I was up two stories high, and there was nowhere that any of my extremities could reach a rock and stay stable without falling, I think I psyched myself out. I also think that, considering I am 5’2 “, it was a little harder for me to reach rocks that were farther apart. I did have to jump for one, which was scary, but after I successfully grabbed the rock, it was actually a really good, rewarding feeling.
 According to the internet, short climbers don’t necessarily have a disadvantage in height, but they do have to find ways to overcome that difference, unlike a tall climber, so maybe my height isn’t an excuse, just a barrier to get through.
What I Learned
I just want all rock climbers to know that I applaud them, because climbing was not easy. It was taxing on my body and on my mind. In order to be a climber, you definitely have to be agile and strong, but also calm and focused, so you can keep your cool when you have to find a rock and a route to take when there seemingly isn’t one.
I learned that maybe I should work on my mental abilities in situations where I find myself actually panicking. For example, while I was climbing, I began panicking, and I never really do that. I did try to calm myself down while I was up there by breathing and telling myself I was okay; clearly, I didn’t really believe myself. I should work on my forearm strength, too. When I attempt my next excursion of rock climbing, I will do the research on how to climb properly, so I don’t psych myself out again.
So, although I didn’t make it all the way to the top, I still felt proud of myself in the moment and felt really good afterwards because it was a little accomplishment I set for myself that I achieved. I am still proud of myself for trying it simply because I wanted to do it, so I did. I tested my abilities and learned new things about myself, like I learned that being afraid, but willing, should become a motivator in my life to try new things, I wouldn’t try otherwise, and bravery is a skill that I want to develop further, as it could get me far with the possibilities. Maybe, one day, I’ll try rock climbing again. I want to actually, because I made it far enough, once I know I can keep pushing those boundaries! I believe that I can make it to the top, maybe not next time, but eventually I will. There is a lesson to be learned here: even if you are scared of something you want to do, just try it, because you never know how you’ll feel or what you’ll learn from the experience.