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Mental Health

Tiktok-ing Through My Eating Disorder Recovery

I jumped on the TikTok wagon and created an account to track my eating disorder recovery. January 1st, 2021, was my first day of posting “what I eat in a day.” It was easier for me to come out about my eating disorder on TikTok than on any other social platform. I don’t follow anyone from my additional social media accounts, and I think that’s what allows me to post content without overthinking. The last time I posted on Instagram was in April 2020, and TikTok has allowed me to create a small community and engage with others going through recovery. 


woman texting
Photo by Andrea Piacquadio from Pexels

I first began tracking my food through the Recovery app, which my dietician monitored. I soon found some flaws in the app. What works for me may not work for others, so that is very important to keep in mind. I liked the Recovery app at first because I could snap a picture, include a meal caption, and make a post directly to my food log. However, I soon started getting carried away with all of the ingredients I could specify in the description. I realized it was not a healthy feature, plus I was able to see all of the food I consumed throughout the day. I decided to give the app a break for a while. 

 

I went on a TJ Maxx haul and found a food diary notepad. The notepad’s features are designed for weight loss, but I repurposed it to track my food instead. I loved the color and size. I simply write in a tiny box what I had during each meal. Additionally, there is a snack section and a water tracker. I found this method to work better because I do not have the option to go in-depth about my food. And at the end of the week, I can scan what I had and look at my water intake levels. Plus, there’s a cute stop point at the end, which allows you to identify what kind of week you had: epic triumph, nice try, or there’s always next week


Pexels

I’ve been using a notepad to track my food, but I wanted to reinforce this habit. I started TikTok because I was inspired by Brittani Lancaster’s “what I eat in a day” videos. I love watching her TikToks and seeing what her meals look like because it’s motivating to see others eat. Watching Brittani be so open about her eating disorders made me realize that recovery will look different for everyone, but it is possible.  


Bowl of chia seed pudding topped with fruit
Photo by Jannis Brandt from Unsplash

I have fun editing my food videos at the end of the day. I don’t have many followers or likes, but I am content knowing it’s an outlet I can use with others struggling with food. I’ve received many encouraging comments, which has motivated me to keep posting and follow through with recovery. I feel silly telling people I have a TikTok about my eating disorder, but hey, it’s my life. And my path to recovery! 


Photo by Andrea Piacquadio from Pexels

Here are some body-positive TikTokers you should follow! Replace diet culture content with these gals who will fill your fyp with positivity and encouragement.  

  1. @brittanilancaster, of course! Her motto is Balance is Key!

  2. @claraandherself, a body-positive and self-confidence advocate!

  3.  And, of course, my little internet corner where I am learning to fall back in love with food again. Find me @melissatduran on both TikTok and Instagram!

A first-generation Latina crushing her life goals! IG: @melissatduran
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