Anxiety

Heart racing

Like erratic beating of the drums

Out of sync, out of control

The metallic taste in my mouth

The taste of invisible blood

I can’t spit it out, no matter how much I try

My stomach churns

I try to keep the food down

The nausea takes over, I vomit into the sink

I sweat uncontrollably

The feeling of sweat you get when you’re ill

I shower ten times, trying in vain to cool down

My mind is racing at lightning speed

My paranoia out of control

I lie in bed and suffer, hoping for it to end

There is no comfort from it

There is no escape from it

There is nothing, nothing I can do

I ride this wave of anxiety

Until the ocean of it decides

Until, until it decides—that it’s over.

• anxiety
• mental health
• poetry