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Kenyon Pick Up Lines, Vol. 3

As a tradition, I have spent the past three years brainstorming the best and worst chat-up lines to use in any and all situations here on the hill. If the following lines just aren’t quite what you’re looking for, check out the original Kenyon Pickup lines, and its sequel.

They say third time’s the charm, right? If these lines don’t seem charming enough for you, just wink very slowly while saying them, and wiggle your shoulder a little, with one eyebrow raised — it works for me 3/10 times.


1. Are you a room in Storer? Because I’d “waite” for you.

2. You must be Graham Gund ’63, because you seem to have control over my life.

3. Is your heart a Peirce Cup? Because I’d like to steal it.

4. Is your name Paul? Because I’d like you to be my New man.


5. They must have written our Alma Mater about you, because you’re thrilling.

6. Are you Ransom Riggs ’99? Because you’ve got me feeling peculiar.

7. You’re so cute, you’d make the Ascension Stairs look good.

8. Do you work in maintenance? Because you sweep me off my feet.

9. Are you from Wiggin St. Coffee? Because I like you a latte.

10. You’re part of my Master Plan.

11. Make like Nick Petricca ’09. Shut up and dance with me.

Bonus Lines:

12. Are you “the stuff”? Because I’d like to hurry home with you. (Via Amy Schatz)

13. Like the pasta line in Peirce, my love for you is never-ending. (Via Jessica Berger)

Good luck with all of your romantic endeavors this Valentine’s Day!


Image credits: Giphy.com

Reagan Neviska is a senior at Kenyon College where she studies Anthropology and Music. She is an active member of her coed Greek service organization, The Archon Society, as well as the president of Gospel Choir, a Her Campus Chapter Writer, and a member of the Symphonic Wind Ensemble, where she plays percussion. Reagan's interests include reading, practicing and listening to music, playing with dogs (her family has four!) and watching Downton Abbey.  You can follow her on Twitter and Instagram @Reagaroni.
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