We are biased toward ourselves and we are biased against ourselves. We think about ourselves with this inbuilt lens of obsession and criticism that blurs our vision; sometimes it’s impossible to see yourself without that bias or judgment. And often, a professional can help provide us with the correct lens.
Therapy is a step in life that encourages change. Going to therapy may not work out for everyone or everything, but when it does work, for even the littlest things, it gives us room in life for change.
It helps us look at the same things, the same life, and ourselves with more clarity and empathy. Because—let’s face it—it’s far easier to cut slack for others than it is to empathise with yourself.
I asked the public for the ideas and visions their therapists shared with them that ended up sticking for life. Here’s how people responded:
- ‘You don’t have to deal with the stress of putting up a façade, you can be true to everyone in your life and yourself.’
- ‘Listen to your body. If/when you don’t, it will find indirect ways to communicate to you.’
- ‘Every person has their own survival instincts, don’t worry about other people.’
- ‘We create so much in our heads and feel things. Believe your sensations and live your existential reality because that is what is actually happening to you and not what’s inside your mind.’
- (To their mother)—‘He has his own journey.’
- ‘Make sure to have something to look forward to at the end of the day, because that’s what keeps you happy.’
- ‘Stop looking back because you’re not the same anymore.’
- ‘There will always be a grey area. It doesn’t mean you have to fret over choosing.’
- ‘As long as it makes sense to you, nothing else matters. Everything will fall into place in its time.’
It is hopeful, and beautiful, to see how these statements might apply to us even when they weren’t said for us. When I read these, I feel that I am not alone. I feel that the person who was told it also felt like me. I feel that I am not weird or different because I am not the only one to feel that way. I feel that I am like you, and that you are like me. And sometimes, that’s all that matters.