In my high school AP psychology class, we watched a documentary about the psychology of happiness. I don’t know why, but ever since that day, it’s stuck with me. I just can’t seem to forget it. Who would’ve thought the blockbuster 2011 documentary Happy would influence my life in a way I couldn’t shake?
Sometimes, the things you least expect impact your life the most.
A scene from the movie I remember most is a man in Louisiana on his boat, where it cuts to him later hosting a seafood boil with friends and family. He looks genuinely at peace and talks about being happy. Watching this simple scene of family and friends and his joy, I remember thinking that if I had his life, I wouldn’t be happy, and that thought made me pause. I began to think, what kind of life would make me happy?
As I thought about it over time, I realized that happiness isn’t really about waiting for your dream life to appear; it’s about something we slowly build within the life we already have.
Maybe a dream life isn’t something you arrive at through perfect circumstances, but maybe it’s living the life you have right now fully and appreciating it by finding the small moments of happiness in your life right now.
The film continues to show people from all walks of life and shows different ways of practicing happiness that I still think about today. While these tips offer ways to practice happiness, they don’t guarantee happiness all the time, since emotions come and go. Still, practicing them has helped me feel more present, grateful, and content in my own life.
Practicing Gratitude
One of the simplest habits I started experimenting with was gratitude. I even downloaded an app called Gratitude Plus Journal to write down something I’m grateful for each day.
While doing this, I’ve also noticed something interesting while tracking my fitness data with my WHOOP band. On days when I take a few minutes to reflect on gratitude, my recovery score — my body’s ability to perform — is scored higher than on days that I don’t.
At first, practicing gratitude can feel difficult. It’s often much easier to notice the things we don’t have rather than the things we do. However, gratitude doesn’t have to start big; it can begin with the small things we often take for granted.
Whenever I’m overwhelmed with exams, school, or work, I pause for a moment and think, how lucky am I that my biggest stress right now is a grade on a test? What a privilege that is. I’m reminded that being stressed about school is a privilege many people would love to have. Seeing how privileged I am suddenly makes everything else feel smaller.
Something that I love most about the app is seeing what other people are grateful for. As I scroll, I see entries like, “Had a good soccer game tonight,” “Balcony time with perfect weather,” “Clean laundry,” “Walks with friends,” and “Trying a new recipe.”
Scrolling through the app and reading other people’s entries sometimes makes me smile even more than writing my own. It reminds me that happiness often lives in the small, ordinary moments we often overlook. It’s made me stop and reflect on the idea that maybe life is just a collection of the small, happy moments, which can sometimes mean more to us than the big milestones we think we’re chasing.
Reframing Negative Thoughts
Positive thinking can also be one of the hardest habits to practice. It’s easy to become frustrated, negative, or feel like the world is working against you.
One small mental exercise I’ve tried is reframing minor inconveniences that I experience. If I’m stuck behind someone driving slowly in traffic, instead of getting annoyed immediately, I tell myself, maybe this is teaching me patience.
I also remind myself that I don’t know the situation of the person in front of me. Maybe they’re an older driver whose only freedom is to drive, or maybe they’re a student driver who’s nervous, in which case, both people need kindness. Thinking about it that way helps me approach the situation with more patience rather than frustration.
I also ask myself, what’s the rush?
If I end up arriving somewhere a few minutes late, I think, oh well, the world will keep spinning. This slight shift in my internal dialogue makes me feel less anxious and present. Which, in turn, makes me appreciate small moments more, such as my daily commute to work, which I never did before.
Recently, I’ve also started to think about struggle differently. Instead of seeing it as purely negative, I’ve tried to remind myself that struggling often means I’m fighting for something worth the struggle, and reframing my mindset this way makes me appreciate something I once dreaded.
The Psychology of Happiness
When I learned about the psychology of happiness in class, I learned that studying happiness involves positive psychology, which focuses on building overall well-being rather than just fixing problems.
A concept in this specifically is the PERMA model, which suggests that well-being can come from five key elements: positive emotions, engagement in activities, relationships with others, meaning or purpose, and accomplishment.
After learning about this, it made more sense to me. Anytime I’m feeling down and don’t feel like hanging out with my friends, I push myself to go anyway. I do this because I know that engagement in activities and our relationships with others are key to being happy, and almost every time I end up glad I chose to go.
What happiness looks like to me
Ever since incorporating this into my life, I’ve noticed that my happiest moments usually look pretty simple. They happen when I’m laughing with friends, trying something new, feeling connected to a community, or appreciating something small about my day. Showing me that happiness shows up in the quiet, ordinary parts of life.
Maybe that man in Louisiana on his boat understood something I was just beginning to learn: happiness isn’t always about having the perfect life.
Sometimes it’s just about noticing the life you already have, the people in it, what you’ve accomplished so far, how far you’ve already come, and feeling excited for what’s still ahead.
Want to see more HCFSU? Be sure to follow us on Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, and Pinterest!