Anxiety. Touchy subject? Maybe. But let’s get into it. Full blast.
Recently I felt a calling in my heart to shed some light on this topic since A) it is felt among many young teens and adults and B) it is something that SHOULD be openly talked about. Mental health is important–it is not something that should be overlooked or used as an “excuse” nor should it be something we view as negative. It is a raw and a very much real thing. It is our mental, psychological, and emotional well-being and every individual, in way or another, has wrestled with it. And when I mean “everyone has wrestled with it,” I do not mean it in a way where I am belittling ones’ emotions because although it is common and nobody is all perfectly put together, people feel these emotions of anxiety, depression, anger, etc in DIFFERENT ways. That is what makes mental health unique to the individual.
I usually don’t open up about my anxiety. Not because I am ashamed about it but because my anxiety is not who I am. It is just something I am working through and you probably are too. So just know that this is a safe place. Perhaps someone you know has been dealing with it and you have the ability to identify and be a hand of hope. Anxiety can creep up on you and feel like the pressure of an elephant sitting on your chest in the morning. It can feel like a dark cloud throughout your day where you feel sad and you can’t pinpoint where this emptiness is coming from. It can be shortness of breath that comes completely out of blue in a social setting and you don’t want anyone else to notice so you try as much as possible to hold it together. Maybe it’s constant thoughts of worry and nervousness and no matter how hard you try, you just can’t sleep at night. As much as these feelings are not OK and it is a challenge, I’m here to resonate with you and tell you that you are a work in progress.
Real-life is tough. Real-life, unfortunately, is not behind a screen. As a society, we rely too much on the instant gratification and the notifications to boost us up. It isn’t Instagram or Twitter or Snapchat or what have you–those are simply “fillers” or distractions that we use to pretend we have it all together and it just clouds our reality. Real-life is family, relationships, work, school, finances, and our personal interests and passions. It is the day to day interactions. It is working an extra shift because you need the money. It is going back to school because you realize that you don’t want to settle for the career you chose. You crave more. It is breakups and heartbreak that turn into chapters of healing and self growth. It is meeting after meeting. Starting your own business. Making time to call your mom ever since you moved out for college. Picking up the kids. Making time to work out and eat healthier. And even then we fall into the comparison scheme. “Well, he’s making so much money…I mean look at the car he drives and have you seen his house? And she is just so pretty. I want her body. Have you seen how often she travels?” #tellmemore right? If only we just listened to ourselves. We all have the potential to be better individuals each and every day but at the end of the day, it is a choice. Yes, our lives feel rushed at times. We feel like we can’t catch a breath and we get down on ourselves if we don’t get everything on our to-do list done the same day or if we feel like we are not being proactive about whatever it is we are passionate about. I’m here to tell you that there is a perfectly put together plan for your life that you don’t even know is coming. Don’t set the bar so high. Sometimes we need help. Sometimes we need a break. Take baby steps and reward yourself for how far you’ve come and how much value you offer to those around you.
Not everybody will understand you but it is OK. You don’t have to let this define you. You have to trust the process and know what individuals in your life you can trust enough to open up about your anxiety with. It is not meant to be kept in a bubble in the back of your brain just because you feel like a burden or because you’re afraid of judgment. No. Take a mental break if you need to find your peace. Disconnect yourself a bit from anything that is holding you back from growing through your anxiety. It is healthy to get the help you need whether that be speaking with a therapist, picking up a new hobby, or even taking a bubble bath but those are also just resources. You are ultimately the one who has to be able to accept or control the way you let anxiety control the different aspects of your life. Sometimes you have to take a step back from all of the people pleasing and check in with yourself to see if you truly are OK too.
It is all a balance and you will get there.