I think we can all collectively agree that change is scary. As much as people say that change is good for you, I’d rather not have to deal with the repercussions of having to face something new.
My sophomore year of college was filled with loads of changes. Every day was spent freaking out because I never felt like I could set a solid routine for myself. I felt lost, confused, and frustrated at the world for everything that was happening. I was losing myself in trying to fit into everyone’s picture of me, instead of taking the time to take care of myself both physically and mentally.
Even though I absolutely hate change, I knew that it was exactly what I needed because I knew I could never be able to repeat my sophomore year. I wanted my junior year to be different and new, even if an unknown future seemed horrifying.
If you have ever met me, it is very likely that you will eventually learn that I play on the tennis team at Cal Lutheran. I am forever grateful for all of the friendships that I have made over my past two years in school. However, it was the end of my season when I decided to take all of my junior year off to focus on school and my mental health. I have been playing tennis since I was five and competitively since I was eight years old, so to stop practicing completely was an enormous change for me. I was nervous, but ultimately knew it was something that needed to be done.
I am now a junior and it is safe to say that I have yet to regret my decision. As selfish as this sounds, this year is about me and finding myself again. I’ve opened myself to new opportunities and experiences and I’ve had so much fun exploring my identity. Currently, I am focusing on my applications to Dental school, being an active member of clubs, and building better relationships with friends and family.
This article is not to encourage women to quit their sports by any means. If you love what you do then keep going girl because I am so proud of you. This article is a message to anyone who is struggling with this feeling of being lost. YOU ARE NOT ALONE! You are important, you are worth something, and you matter. It is not up to others to tell you who you have to be. It is all up to you girlfriend and I hope that my quick rant can relate to some of you who need a push to finally put yourselves first. I believe in you! Embrace the change.
