Her Campus Logo Her Campus Logo
Life > Experiences

How I Dealt With My First Heartbreak: The Ultimate Breakup Guide

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at BU chapter.

Now that I have had the time to reflect and fully move on, here are the steps that helped me heal from my breakup:

Block them

When my ex and I initially broke up we stayed in constant contact with each other, and I was miserable. It’s impossible to get over someone you’re still friends with. Distance doesn’t have to last forever, but it’s the best thing to do for the first few months to help you move on. 

Get rid of All painful reminders

Pictures, gifts, letters, clothes, all of it. If you really don’t want to toss it all in the trash, shove it in a drawer or closet that you will never go in. Seeing those memories around your room will only remind you of your heartbreak and hurt you even more.

Cry it all out

Crying is healing. The best thing to do is to feel all your emotions and let it out. I spent hours crying it all away, letting myself truly feel everything and move on. Bottling up your feelings will only make the healing process longer.


The number one thing that helped me the most was writing out all my feelings. Whenever I heard new rumors about him or how he was doing, or whenever he tried to reach out, the Notes app was my best friend. I ended up writing a diary that showcased how I truly felt throughout the relationship.

Each entry was a significant event in our relationship when it started: our first Christmas together, the first bad fight, etc. I continued writing diary entries for a few months after the breakup about how my healing process was going and where I was mentally.

Reflection is so important to moving on. It helps you release all your emotions and allows you to look at and understand how you’re feeling.


Do things that make you happy or distract you. Listen to music, watch movies, hang out with friends, start a new project.

Being single is the best time to remember and explore who you are and what you like. Everything is for and about you again, so take advantage of that!

I hope this guide is useful to you no matter what stage of the healing process you’re in.

Remember, breakups are an amazing opportunity to learn and become a better version of yourself!

Want to keep up with HCBU? Make sure to like us on Facebook, follow us on Instagram, check out our Pinterest board, watch us on TikTok, and read our latest Tweets!

Hi! I’m Riya and I'm from New York City. I'm a writer for the Boston University chapter of Her Campus and I like to write advice columns and share my interests with others. I attended Dwight Englewood for high school and I'm currently a freshman at BU, majoring Political Science and Journalism on the Pre-Law track. I have interned for Aerie and worked at Valentino Soho during my summers. Outside of writing, I really enjoy fashion and art. I often draw and design clothes. I also spend a lot of time styling friends and family. I enjoy drawing and painting in my free time as well. I love traveling and exploring new places, going to restaurants, museums, and tourist attractions.