We can all say that it has been a little bit of a tough time in the year 2020. It’s also fair to assume people need more support now than ever before. Thus, we are all continuously trying to help one another and lend a helping hand. Giving support to others is obviously encouraged during these times, however, knowing when you’re available to give support is key.
This leads me to my point – mental health affects more than just the individual. Mental health affects everyone. People are expected to constantly be there for others without taking the time to be ‘unavailable’ and recharge themselves. There are many reasons, however, a major one is that people believe they can’t say no… and that’s understandable. It’s compelling to always want to be the supporting friend for your pal in need. However, it’s important to take the time to recharge and recuperate yourself. We are all human and all have our own battles and responsibilities.
Thus, we should take the time to learn when we need to take a step back from being someone’s support and care for ourselves. As you can’t fill another cup when yours is empty.
Learn When to Take a Step Back
Learn when it’s time to take a step back. I understand that taking a step back from your loved ones can be difficult. However, we need to learn boundaries when it comes to helping people with their mental health. You are not a terrible human being if you can’t stay up all night to be there for a friend. You might not be able to since you have a midterm the next day that you want to be alert for. Or you want to go to a friend’s house to be their shoulder to cry on, but you have a deadline that needs to be met and you know you won’t get it done if you go. Even if you just need a night for yourself, it’s okay to say no.
Clarify your personal boundaries with yourself and with others. Remember to do and acknowledge what works for you and what doesn’t. Boundaries are important and are critical for not just relationships with others, but also with yourself.
Compassion Fatigue
Compassion fatigue is emotional and physical exhaustion when exerting one’s self to be a constant support for others. It leads to the diminished ability to empathize or feel compassion for others, often described as the negative cost of caring.
The following can be symptoms of compassion fatigue: feeling overwhelmed, irritable, sadness, and anxiety. Constant self-blame, dwelling around others’ trauma or having changes in belief systems. There also can be higher rates of self-isolation, poor coping, less productivity and reduced pleasure.
Essentially, compassion fatigue is a serious concern and shouldn’t be taken lightly. As much as we all want to be there for others, everyone has their limit which needs to be respected.
Your Mental Health is Important, Too
Let me say it loud for the people in the back: SELF-CARE, SELF-CARE AND SELF-CARE!
Your mental health is important too and as much as you should care for others, you need to remember to look after yourself too.
Some reminders to help recharge yourself:
Eat lots of good foods that give you energy for the day. This doesn’t include only having a coffee and cliff bar (something I can be guilty of myself). Having full, healthy meals being part of your day will make a huge overall difference in your well-being–mentally and physically.
Add physical movement to your day. Go for a walk to clear your head or add some yoga to the beginnings of your morning. Having intentional physical movement be a part of your day can be a great stress reliever.
Proper sleeping habits. Sleeping is crucially important for your mental and physical state. Do what is necessary to get a good amount of sleep into your night. There are different methods to make falling asleep easier such as magnesium and calcium combination, lavender pillow spray and chamomile tea.
Seek quality support wherever you can. It’s important to have quality support in your life, whether that be self, social or professional support. Take the time to have quality people in your life to enrich yourself and be the best version of yourself.
