When I was younger, there was no such thing as regret. To me, everything I did simply meant I was living my life to the fullest. So, like many defiant teenagers raised by strict Hispanic parents, I pushed boundaries whenever I could. I wanted to experience everything, and I lived through so many different versions of myself in such a short period of time. Now being in my early twenties and looking back on my past experiences, both the blissful and painful, I often find myself returning to the idea of “what if”. What if I reacted differently? What if I had chosen another path? So many “what ifs” that would fill my mind and keep me awake at night, sometimes bringing real distress.
As I get older and become more aware of these feelings, I have also come to realize that regret can be such a beautiful thing. No matter what you have been through, regret does not always have to be viewed as something negative. Sometimes it simply reflects growth, awareness, and the ability to look back with honesty. Our mindset shapes so much of how we experience life, and in many ways, our reality becomes a reflection of our consciousness. The most realistic and effective way to deal with regret in your twenties is to shift your mindset. The mind is powerful. Something as simple as telling yourself that you are going to have a good day can make everything feel a little brighter and a little more possible. We are often reflections of our thoughts; when we feel confident in the decisions we make, the confidence radiates in the way we carry ourselves and move through the world.
I like to think of my “regrets” as experiences. Those experiences have shaped my character and helped me find myself through all the different versions of who I thought I needed to be. Every moment, even the difficult ones, has served a greater purpose in my life. They have all played a role in helping me reach the peace, balance, and self-awareness I live with now. If I could speak to my younger self, I would tell her she was right to want to live life fully. Regret means that you have lived. It is not something to be ashamed of or embarrassed by. Instead, it is something to reflect on; a reminder that you have felt deeply, taken chances, and allowed different versions of yourself to exist.
At the end of the day, if you live with integrity, love, and happiness, everything else will follow. Whether every decision was right or wrong, love and good intentions can carry you further than anything else!