In my 24 years of life, I have heard my fair share of stories about women’s first gynecological appointments. Some accounts recited awkward small talk while others left a more startling impression. Suffice to say, many of these stories were anxiety-inducing, which only added to my own fears surrounding visiting the specialist.
I don’t believe I’m alone in this experience, as it can be jarring to share such vulnerability with a medical professional in a world where women’s sexualities, identities, and experiences are often tokenized, fetishized, and overwhelmingly dismissed. In lieu of this, I refer back to the adage knowledge is power. The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists recommend women first go to the gynecologist between 13 and 15 years of age. If you haven’t been yet, it’s time to get educated and prepare for your first visit to the lady doctor.
- Do your homework
-
Homework isn’t just for the classroom; it also applies to real life situations. Whether you’re 15 or 25, you should be taking steps now to be responsible for your health and wellness. (If you use your parent’s health insurance, under Obamacare by the age of 26 you will no longer be eligible to be covered by their health insurance.) This includes making appointments, tracking co-pay bills, and preparing properly for appointments.
Resist the urge to check Google five minutes before your appointment; carefully find reliable resources that best help you prepare. Planned Parenthood offers free resources including Roo, an anonymous chat bot intended to educate people about sexual wellness.
- Reflect on what you want and where you’re going
-
Consider the sexual wellness choices that work best for you. If you’re considering birth control, which type matches your lifestyle and desires? Are you potentially considering usage of contraceptives for acne, hormonal stability, sexual intercourse or all three? What are their side effects?
Be ready to talk to your doctor about followup appointments, in case whichever path you chose does not work out how you originally intended.
- Practice asking questions
-
Speaking up as a woman (even to medical personnel!) can be crazy difficult because you may not want to feel like you’re “burdening” them or taking up their time. But remember: this is their job. Gynecologists are professionals intended to provide resources and check in with you about your sexual health.
The first time I went to the gynecologist, I brought a brief list of questions only to become too nervous during the appointment and completely forgot them. I regretted the decision immediately afterwards, when I realized almost none of my questions were answered!
Had I practiced speaking up for myself and wording these questions better, maybe I would have felt more confident in bringing them up. Talk to a family member or friend about their experiences and be honest with your doctor that this is your first time. Transparency and resources prior to your appointment will empower you to be brave.
- Check in if you would prefer a partner or guardian to go with you
-
This is a personal decision, and one only you can make for yourself. There are benefits to going alone or bringing someone for support; either are completely acceptable. For example, if you’re nervous around doctors, having a friendly face there may help.
Remember though: if you’re sexually active, expect to receive a pelvic exam, a pap smear, and an STI screening. Some may prefer privacy during the exam, while others may favor the comfort of another. Ultimately, I chose to go alone because I wanted to get to know my doctor one-on-one the first time we met.
- Relax
-
It’s worth noting that going to a new doctor can be a stressful experience, let alone going to a gynecologist during a global pandemic. My advice? Blast your favorite playlist on the way there, communicate openly with your doctor, and give yourself a treat once it’s over; I pulled over to Starbucks for my seasonal Pumpkin Spiced Latte.
Gentle reminder too to take proper precautions prior to and during your visit in accordance with CDC guidelines. Wear your mask, practice social distancing in public, utilize touchless payments when you can, and wash your hands upon returning home.
Rather than dwell on my anxiety, I focused on my own eagerness to learn about my own sexuality and overall wellness. After going, I experienced such relief knowing I had taken responsibility for my health and made a choice that gave me options and education for years to come.