For me, first year was an adventure: I lived on my own for the first time, met a lot of new people, and was finally able to pursue my passion in a challenging environment. Second year has not been so productive: a heavier workload, increased responsibility, a home without sophs or all of your friends as neighbors can make the year more of a painful transition. But this isn’t only a second year problem; it’s hardly an exaggeration to say that every student struggles during the transition to university level work. Procrastination becomes standard procedure: skipping one class to attend another is a regularly observed strategic move, coffee addictions develop, and all-nighters are the only way to accomplish everything. Getting grades back, even the anticipation thereof, has everyone on edge. Not only on edge, but mentally unwell. Exams are pushed back due to overwhelming amounts of stress and anxiety, people have to go home to escape a fearful school environment, meals are skipped. When grades do finally return and you compare them to the grades required for your desired Master’s program; all you want to do is escape.
It’s in times such as these that I wonder how my parents ever got through university in their time. What gets me through this stress and anxiety is Netflix. Feeling overwhelmed by the long list of assignments you need to get done in one night? Why not watch Family Guy for an hour or so to lighten the mood. Need to celebrate after all of your finals are finally over? How about watching the newest season of Riverdale with your roommates. Got a grade back on OWL that doesn’t meet the requirements for your program? Watching Stranger Things until you pass out will make going to sleep a lot easier. With the variety of coping entertainment available to us today, it makes it difficult to actually sit down and be alone with our thoughts because we never actually have to.
I’m not sure how your family is around the holidays, but this sort of lifestyle is not exactly permitted in my childhood home.
Don’t get me wrong: coming home for the holidays can be a wonderful thing. But when I arrive home with assignments still left to do and the lingering sense of dread of the next semester hanging over my head, I find it difficult to break my habits of staying up late and binge watching literally any show. I love my family, but often when I get home and see my exam grades on OWL, the last thing I want to do is talk about how I feel. It’s much easier to deal with the emotions of university life by drowning my sorrows in media rather than actually confronting them. It especially feels hopeless when, even though I feel better approaching my university struggles after a weekend at home, I turn around and the stress and anxiety are there waiting for me when I return to school. It seems a lot easier to trudge through the holidays until I can return to my independent lifestyle where I choose how to deal with my problems.
However, my better judgement tells me otherwise. When my mom wakes me up at 8:00 A.M. to go shopping, I groan and roll out of bed. When my dad tells me I can’t go out with my high school friends because he needs me to help him with some chores, I put on a smile and do it with him. When my grandparents need to spend hours and hours with me telling the same stories about when they were young and how embarrassing I was as a baby, I laugh and play along. I do this, because I know the holidays won’t last forever – and I know, though it doesn’t feel like it yet, this is probably the best thing for me. Although nothing I do with my family actually addresses my university problems and those struggles will be right there waiting for me when I return, when I take time to do silly holiday things with my family I, for once, restrain from drowning my sorrows. Instead of ignoring them, I do something to combat them: I do something that improves my life, though in no way related to my problems at school. Even though I don’t always get along with my parents, and even though everything we do is not the most exhilarating life experience, I dedicate time to the people who gave me everything I have in this life. I give thanks and, at the very least, offer my family a good time. It takes effort to get out of bed that early for my little brother but somehow, I’m able to sleep easier that night.
So embrace your trip home this year: enjoy your time not just with people you love, but in an environment that will heal you in ways you didn’t even know possible. Though it’s not always easy to accept, Netflix will numb you and suppress the symptoms, but dedicating some time to others will heal you, and hopefully cure a bit of what’s actually wrong.
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