To the Mourning College Student

Losing a loved one is miserable no matter what stage of life you’re in, the impact is great from the time we can understand loss until our own death. I can’t imagine a time when living without someone or something you have cared about and valued would be easy. As if life isn’t always busying itself with being life, when you stack academics on top, it’s enough to break even the sanest person. Then death comes and creates even more chaos? Wow. You mean to tell me that I may very well have to go to class, or take an exam the week after attending a funeral? Crazy, right? But I did it and for the sake of the mental health of my peers, this needs to be discussed.

Coping with losing one of your favorite beings can shift your mindset completely. Procrastination is the least of your problems at this point, because it’s now just become a matter of getting something done— never mind a due date. When you make it to the big leagues, that is post-high school academia, no one warns you about the fact that sad things don’t quit happening just because you’re stressed out. While we would all love for sickness and tragedies to take a not-so-brief pause until we can finish studying and paper-writing, that’s unrealistic.

People always say “it’s okay” when you’re sad, probably instinctively, but obviously, nothing feels okay at a time like that. The point we should highlight here is that it’s okay to grieve. Even as a student when it seems there’s no time to even stop and think, one should make time to be alone or around people and just cry. Inform your professors, even the toughest ones may be able to bend a little to help you out. You are not above other people’s sympathy when you’re dealing with a really hard time, so do not pretend to be. Busying yourself with school work will only postpone the sadness. If you’re a part of a sports team or an organization, keep somebody who is also a part clued in so that your poor performance or lack of effort doesn’t disrupt the nature of things. It seems obvious, but remember to eat, hydrate, sleep, and shower. Day by day, week by week, the tasks that became so tall after your world was turned upside down will return to a normal part of your routine.

You won’t "get over it", but you’ll definitely get through it!