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This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at UIC chapter.

Remember the saying our parents would tell us: if you don’t have anything nice to say, then don’t say anything at all. It’s a saying we forget, or sometimes we don’t realize that words hurt. Words hurt even when the intent behind it was supposed to be positive. Bad or good intent behind words said still leaves an impact, which could be hurtful or empowering. What about silence though? We think about words being said, but what about the words that aren’t said. Silence leaves an impact as well, which most of the time can be negative. So, does one stay silent or does one speak?

If someone speaks, it can leave a positive or negative impact. Words have so much meaning behind them that can be hurtful or empowering to a person. The impact of words stays with a person. I mean yes some people could forget about things that were said, but for me, I’ve always remembered the words said. The weight of words is something a person carries with them for a variable amount of time. I remember when I was 5, I was called fat, which didn’t stop until high school. Yes, kids say the meanest things or don’t know what they’re saying, but the words still stay. People always say “shake it off,” or “don’t listen to them.” It doesn’t matter though, right? We still carry the weight of the words said to us. I carried all the mean things people have said to me such as “You’re not pretty,” “You’re fat,” “You’re a tease,” “You’re fake,” and the list goes on, which includes the lies told. Not all words are bad though because there’s the positivity of words that have stayed with me such as “I’m lucky to have you as a friend,” “You’re strong,” and “You’re sweet.” All of these have shaped me for better and for worse, but that’s just the impact words carry.

What about the words not said to us? It’s strange to think how silence can leave an impact. You would think that if words aren’t said it wouldn’t do much, since how can silence really affect a person. It’s when a guy leaves you without an answer or if you get in a fight with your friend. There’s that silence of neither of you saying a word. I mean the guy I was talking to left me without an answer for a week. No response, which I mean is fine, but it’s when they have nothing to say to you even when they have no answer. It makes you question what happened and if you did something wrong. You don’t immediately assume the other person was in the wrong, but take the blame at least I do. It’s also when your friend just stops talking to you and you wonder what happened to make them mad at you. The silence could happen when you hear someone is talking badly about you, and your friend didn’t defend you. It’s the silence that makes the person wonder what they did wrong. It’s the silence that makes them question themselves. It’s the silence that makes them wonder a million different things about you and themselves.

So, the question asked earlier was does one speak or stay silent? There’s actually no answer to it. If you are silent or speaking, just know both causes an impact. There are moments when your friend might need you to be silent because they just need your presence rather than your words. Speak when it’s needed, so a person isn’t wondering a million things. Be mindful of the words that are said because you might just change how a person sees themselves for better or worse. It’s the thought behind words and silence that we need to consider because you never know the impact it may cause.

Hi I'm Aeja! Junior at UIC and a Pre Nursing Major. I try to write what inspires me, so I hope you enjoy my articles!
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