Everyone knows that there are lots of benefits to spending time alone – newfound creativity, increased productivity, more empathy, and the chance to get to know yourself on a deeper level. However, being alone can feel lonely and awkward, and it can be hard to make time for ourselves a priority in our busy schedules. Here are my tips for reclaiming your alone time and learning to truly love being with yourself.
1. Re-evaluate your FOMO
The first step towards loving being alone is shifting your mindset around missing out on things. It can be hard to see your friends having fun without you, but there will always be more opportunities to spend time with people in the future. In order to be content being alone, you have to stop comparing yourself to others and assuming that everyone is having a better time than you are. To do this, I like taking social media breaks and practicing gratitude for the experiences I do get to have. Also, don’t be afraid to try new things just because you have no one to do them with. It will be much more rewarding to go to events and explore alone rather than sitting around wishing you had people to hang out with.
2. Take yourself on dates
Being alone doesn’t have to be boring! Pretend you’re going on a traditional date, get dressed up, and plan a fun activity to do. Solo dates are the perfect time to celebrate yourself and find out what makes you truly happy. Here are some ideas!
- Visit an art museum – the perfect place to unwind and gain some inspiration.
- Watch the sunset and celebrate what you accomplished that day.
- Explore a new town. Wander around, check out the shops and restaurants, and spend some time people watching.
- Go to a farmer’s market and treat yourself to a bouquet of flowers and some delicious food.
- Spend some time reading a new book at a park or cafe.
- Have a beach day and enjoy your favorite beach pastimes, like surfing, swimming, reading, napping, or picnicking.
- Go on a walk or drive and listen to your favorite album.
- Make a collage or Pinterest board of your dream life to get excited for your future.
- Plan a movie marathon and watch all of your favorite movies.
3. Create a “Never Have I Ever” bucket list
A “Never Have I Ever” bucket list is pretty straightforward – a list of things you’ve never done and want to try. The key is to make them realistic but still exciting, so you can try new things and build confidence in an approachable way. Make it a goal to check one off each week or month, depending on how ambitious you’re feeling. Here are some of mine if you need ideas!
- Go to a cat cafe.
- Plant something.
- Throw someone a surprise party.
- Paint on the beach.
- Get a psychic reading.
- Take the train from San Diego to LA.
- Post a video on YouTube.
4. Start your own traditions
Having your own traditions makes life more exciting and ensures that you always have something to look forward to. You could celebrate your half birthday or different phases of the moon, or make up a random holiday where you do all of your favorite activities in one day. You can also have weekly traditions, like going to your favorite coffee shop every Saturday, catching up on podcasts on Mondays, or reserving time on Wednesdays for doing yoga. The most important part is having them be special and meaningful to you!
5. Do random acts of kindness for yourself
You are the most important person in your life, and also the person that you will spend the most time with, so showing love and kindness to yourself is a necessary part of living a happy life. Giving yourself the special treatment you deserve will also help you raise your standards for how others treat you, and spending time alone will be much more fun when you feel loved and appreciated. Here are some suggestions!
- Add gift messages to everything you order online.
- Leave sticky notes with positive affirmations around your living space.
- Buy yourself flowers.
- Make a playlist of love songs and pretend they were written about you.
- Write a love letter to yourself.
- Cook your favorite meal or bake your favorite dessert.
- Write a letter forgiving yourself for your mistakes.
- Unfollow people on social media who make you feel insecure.
- Send yourself a “Congrats” card for small accomplishments.
Being alone can be a beautiful thing. I hope these ideas inspire you to spend more time with yourself and love doing it!