Do you often find yourself put in the position of saying “yes” to anything anyone says? Turning someone or something down is one of my most challenging tasks. It’s not like I want to agree to every Zoom call or virtual event I’m invited to, but I always feel too bad if I say “no.” Although our society praises a “say yes” mentality, saying “no” is sometimes the better option especially when it comes to prioritizing yourself.
If a friend keeps asking you favors all the time and you keep agreeing, chances are you are easily going to be taken advantage of. Don’t keep going out of your way every single time someone asks you to do something for them. Relationships are a two-way road; you can’t be the only one doing things for someone else. At the end of the day, you need to do things for yourself, not only things that benefit another person. It’s totally okay to do nice things for your friends and family sometimes, but there comes a point when it can become too much and saying “yes” to every single thing will get overwhelming.
Saying “yes” all the time will also cause you to spread yourself too thin. In college, you probably already have a lot of stuff on your plate. It’s okay to skip out on some things, to make time for yourself and get what you need to do. A lot of people, including myself, find that saying “no” to someone is a struggle because they are afraid they are going to hurt the other person or miss out on something important. People that care about you will be more understanding than you think. Also, there are sometimes going to be things that you miss out on because you’re busy with other things, and that is perfectly fine! If anything important happened, you can just find out later.
Remember that you control what you do or don’t do. If you want to stay in and watch Netflix after a busy week instead of going to dinner with a friend, that’s understandable, and you shouldn’t feel ashamed for taking care of yourself and prioritizing what you need at the moment. Always respect yourself and do what you need to keep your mental and physical health in check!