Time and time again, I have witnessed so many of my loved ones be pulled down by those who they consider are their closest friends. We all have to admit that this has happened to us at some point in our lives. It is so easy to be blinded by the fact that, as humans, we crave closeness with others. But when that relationship becomes unrewarding, we must learn when to walk away. Whether the friend we thought we could confide in is not as trustworthy as we thought, provides little to no emotional support, or just doesn’t respect us, we deserve better.
Science agrees! A 2014 study conducted by UCLA suggested that a relationship that brings one stress and anxiety can actually cause your immune system to produce proteins that severely impact one’s behavior. Some of these changes include having symptoms of depression and withdrawing from loved ones. But it doesn’t stop there. This protein causes symptoms that can also lead to health issues that develop over time, including cardiovascular disease.
This just goes to show how crucial our inner circle is. It is so important that we do not settle for someone who just provides us with attention. We need to develop deeper and more connected relationships in order to have a healthy and happy life. Otherwise, we will be left feeling unfulfilled and even lonelier than before.
Take a moment to look at the people you would consider are your closest friends. Do you feel like you get as much as you give? Do they make you feel good? Do they ever go the extra mile? Do you find yourself getting excited when you make plans with them? Do you feel valued?
This past year has been a whirlwind. From starting college to then going home for a never ending corona-cation, I am so thankful that I was able to draw on the people in my life that truly empower me. Whether that was a family member, my boyfriend, or a friend, I found individuals I knew I could rely on and support me in times of need. However, I did not find these people overnight. It still takes trial and error to find those you truly connect with. But, it is so important that we never stop trying to put ourselves out there to find our people. We deserve to be empowered by those around us, not torn down.