For the longest time, I did not think that it was going to be possible for me to be able to place others’ opinions aside. I felt like I had to reach expectations that were set by others in order to be accepted.
Since I liked reading and writing, that meant that I liked staying indoors. If I was getting good grades, it meant that I dedicated all of my time to studying. I was the person that strictly focused on academics to some people and did not participate in any events that involved large crowds. Going out to something such as a sports event or just being out late at night came across as a shock to others that knew me.
When I got these reactions from people that knew me, I would feel almost guilty that I was out at these events instead of staying in and focusing on school. Was I disappointing those who knew me?
Of course I was wrong to think that I was creating disappointment. The only disappointment here was the fact that I wanted to follow through with what others felt was acceptable for me to do and what was not. There came a time when I decided that living up to others’ expectations needed to be stopped.
Why was I going to live a life that was defined by other people and not by myself?
It took me a while to come to that realization, but I am happy that I was eventually able to do so rather than never coming to that conclusion. Once I stopped fitting into what people wanted me to be, I noticed that the people around me started changing — the people that were often imposing some unrealistic expectation for me eventually disappeared from my life and were replaced by others who supported me in every way. They do not judge my faults and have even helped me embrace these faults.
Image source: Stocksnap
There are times when I still fall back into the trap of trying to please everyone around me, but I am working on making that impossible. Nobody can create my happiness other than myself, and the only way this can be accomplished is by focusing on myself.
Cover image source: Stocksnap