We dismiss our feelings way too often. We feel frustrated, but never do anything about it. Instead of taking responsibility for our lives and actions, we blame others for how our day is going.
For instance, some of us may say, “My boyfriend didn’t spend enough time with me today,” or, “my roommate is so irritating, she never picks her clothes up off of the floor.” Instead of complaining about how annoying the world is, we need to properly communicate how we’re feeling, so our situations actually improve!
We aren’t used to expressing our emotions to the people who are making us feel worse. Often, suffering in silence is easier than taking action. If you’re too scared to tell your mom that her constant criticism is hurtful, or feel uncomfortable telling your friend to stop mocking your taste in clothing—talking about the issue can change your situation.
Next time your housemate wakes you up doing laundry at 3 a.m., politely tell her how this sort of behavior affects you. If you bottle up all that negative energy, you’ll eventually just resent her.
In any relationship, communication skills are very important. Staying silent when something is affecting you, or acting passive aggressively can harm you the most in the long-run, especially since the person bothering you is probably unaware of their harmful behavior.
You owe it to yourself to ask for the things you need. If you need help in class, turn to the person next to you in lecture and ask! If you need someone to help wake you up in the mornings because you’re late to school every day, ask one of your housemates for assistance!
Don’t dig yourself into a hole, standing by as things get more frustrating day by day. Communicate! Remember: you are not alone in this. What is life if not human connection?