Initially, I thought that my second semester of college would go as smoothly as my first. I thought I would continue feeling motivated to wake up for my 8 a.m., to exercise, and choose healthy options at the dining hall. “The second semester was going to be a breeze, why would it not be?” Instead, I fell into an unhealthy routine within my day-to-day.
I started to skip early classes just to stay in bed for an extra hour or two. I slept in more and more, and went to bed progressively later and later. During the day, I never felt quite awake or really grounded in reality. This led me to consuming copious amounts of caffeine throughout the day (and into the night) to feel present. It felt like a hopeless cycle.
My diet, exercise, and friendships were also points of contention. As a girl with a car on campus, I found myself gravitating towards driving to fast food restaurants rather than walking to the dining halls. I feel embarrassed to admit it, but it’s the truth, and I believe it might be a truth that resonates with others out there too. I lacked the discipline to get up out of bed and go to the gym, or at the very least go for a walk. And on top of that, I felt unfulfilled with my friendships. The people who were supposed to be supportive and loyal felt distant and uncaring, and I felt alone.
Catching the Flu a few weeks into the semester set me back even further…
Things had to change. But it’s so incredibly hard to know where to start, what to do, and how to do it. Actually committing to a habit or change is a lot different than saying you will.
Small habits
Making small, consistent changes in my lifestyle is what finally flipped the switch for me. No one except myself is going to change my habits — I’m the one in control of what I do — no one else dictates that.
I made a list of what I wanted to change. Nothing fancy, just something comprehensive for myself: “I want to get up before 7 on weekdays”, “I want to eat healthy”, “I want to exercise every day,” etc. The end goals felt daunting, so I broke them up into something smaller: “I’ll try to get up 10 minutes earlier than usual”, “I won’t eat takeout more than once this week”, “I’ll try to do Yoga for 20 minutes before bed each night.”
I worked up from these minor goals to points that I felt proud of. “I’ll get up 10 minutes earlier” turned into waking up 30 minutes earlier, then an hour, then a normal, healthy wakeup time that allotted me more time to be mindful rather than rush in my morning routine- and grab some sort of breakfast before class.
The Conclusion
As the days shift from cold and grey into warm and sunny, I feel optimistic about my future- both as a student and as a human. Through changing my habits, little by little, I have begun to feel more true to myself, and more committed to making and maintaining major life changes.
It’s difficult to know where to start when viewing problems from a big-picture perspective, but it’s not hopeless. Taking a couple of steps back is sometimes necessary. Even if an effort feels little, like making sure to drink a glass of water, or to wake up 15 minutes earlier than usual, it makes a world of a difference in reaching your end goals. Prioritize yourself. You are loved, you are worth it, and no, you’re not lazy, you’re human.
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