I often find that my best ideas come at the most inconvenient times. Whether it is while on a long drive or at an early morning shift at work, I try to get down my ideas as soon as possible, and usually, that ends up being in my Notes app. I will say, poetry has never been my favorite. In school, I hated reading it, I hated analyzing it, and I hated being forced to write it. However, there is just something about romanticizing my random trains of thought — most of which are from when I am in my feels, as some would say — and calling it poetry. By no means am I Shakespeare, and honestly, poetry still is not my favorite. So, with all of this in mind, I present to you what I like to call “my collection of sh*tty notes app poetry.”
contradictory feelings. june 25, 2020 1:46 AM
i am angry, but i am also at peace
i am a ball of emotion, but i also don’t care much about things i cannot control
i keep to myself, but i also tell the world my dilemmas
i have endless amounts of empathy, but i am also deeply self-centered
i feel with every fiber of my being; emotions from every side of the spectrum
constantly flowing through my thoughts and veins
our souls are lit with flames and stardust, how
could i not be a walking contradiction?
Clearly, that one was a late-night filled with some unnecessary angst, but nonetheless, a good snapshot of what I mean when I say I have to write things down, no matter what time.
a poem for someone else. october 6, 2020 6:53 AM
i don’t like the taste of coffee
It’s always made me feel a little odd; coffee is everyone’s go-to
i have searched for the effects of caffeine and found them in other places–
tea, energy drinks, and more sleep
but yet i still feel a sense that i am missing something; a feeling or a taste
sometimes i feel the same way about my place in the world
i always find things that make my days better
but yet i still feel like something is missing
This one is titled “a poem for someone else” because I personally love coffee and cannot relate to this ominous narrator. I remember writing this on a really slow shift at my job at a coffee shop. I always found it funny when customers would come in and order anything but coffee because that was not our specialty. Thus, this weird little analogy between disliking coffee and feeling lonely was born.
find it. october 12, 2020 9:00 PM
i know that there is joy in my morning cup of coffee
on my early commutes to work and in small,
seemingly mundane conversations with friends, family, and coworkers
i know that there is joy in the creaks of my childhood home’s floorboards
and in the muffled sounds of my grandmother’s T.V.
but for some reason, i only find joy in the past;
romanticizing times i know were not always happy, but unable to focus on the present
if only i could find the joy i know is there,
maybe destructive nostalgia would fade away
This one is actually one of my favorites that I have written. I think that concept of nostalgia and the inability to live in the present moment is a problem that a lot of people deal with.
The Unfinished Thoughts
While some of them are complete poems with titles and long-winded ideas, I have many that are just singular sentences with no context. Here are a few of my favorites:
“everything’s a joke until it’s not”
“sometimes i feel as though my shadow walks faster than i do”
“i love the vastness of the human experience”
“there is something profound about our ability to make everything profound”
And finally, my favorite seemingly unfinished thought,
“the trees are stationary: a symbolic on trees not moving without the wind”
I’m not quite sure where I was going with that one but I’m sure I thought it was very deep at the moment somehow.
My Notes app is definitely an interesting place to explore, and finding all of these poems tucked in between my to-do lists, card game scores, workout plans, and password lists was an adventure in itself. Once again, I am by no means anything close to a good poet, but I think that writing out how you’re feeling is a great way to express yourself. If anything, I hope that my angsty late night and early morning scrawls have inspired you to embrace your own random strikes of creativity, wherever they may find you.
Can’t get enough of HC UMass Amherst? Be sure to follow us on Instagram, listen to us on Spotify, like us on Facebook, and read our latest Tweets!