On June 27, 2025, I graduated from high school as salutatorian. From that day on, a new life awaited: I was going to the University of Connecticut as an English major. When I moved in on Aug. 20, I assumed that English was going to be the only thing I’d ever study. Furthermore, I claimed that I was going to become a part of the Long River Review, and I believed I was going to obtain tons of executive board positions by my sophomore year. But after spending a year at college, that didn’t become the case.
My first year at UConn wasn’t what I thought it was going to be. Turns out, college life can throw many curveballs at you. While some of those curveballs were painful, they gave me five inspirational lessons that will I will hold on to as I proceed into my sophomore year. If you’re a student who’s about to begin college, these lessons are significant resources that will help you as you embark on your new journey.
1) Don’t Judge Yourself By Appearance
Coming to UConn, I knew no one. One goal I wanted to accomplish was making new friends and finding a community. This is something I struggled with during my first semester. Even after joining a few organizations, I still had trouble finding my people. By the middle of September, I began to ask myself, “What if I wasn’t making any new friends because of my appearance?”
One of the worst mistakes I made in my first year was judging myself by my looks. I was fit, but I saw so many thinner girls hanging out with other girls. Because of that, I began to assume that if I lost weight, then everyone would start to notice me. I went on a calorie deficit, eating about 1000 calories (sometimes less) per day. Within a few weeks, I lost about 20 pounds, but I also got headaches, starvation, and a missed period. Missing my period made me realize what a terrible mistake I made. When I began seeing girls who were my old size hang out with friends, I discovered the true definition of beauty.
If you’re paranoid about your appearance, I hear you! I once thought that beauty revolves around the face and body. But that’s just not true! No matter what you look like, you’re beautiful just the way you are! You don’t need a thin body and tons of makeup to make new friends. All you need instead is a graceful attitude and a beautiful heart.
2) You Might Discover New Things About Yourself, and That’s Okay
For the longest time, I thought I was straight. I’ve developed crushes only on guys, so I assumed they were the only ones I felt attracted to. But this past February, I realized I like both men and women. It was a very strange revelation at first, but with time, I began to embrace my true identity. I eventually came out to my parents, and they both supported me with love and appreciation.
College is a time of discovery. You may encounter some new things about yourself. That’s totally okay. The more new things you discover, the more unique you’ll become!
3) Don’t Be Afraid To Change Your Mind
Not only have I discovered new identities, but I’ve encountered new career interests. After finding out I’m bisexual, I changed my career goals entirely. I thought I wanted to be a full-time author, but it turns out I want to work for a human rights organization and advocate for the disabled and LGBTQ+ communities by doing research projects and conferences. To accomplish these goals, I plan to double major in English and an individualized major called disability and queer activism.
Coming to college, you might assume that you can’t change the major you declared. You might also assume that when you begin college, you need to stick to the visions and career goals you’ve been carrying since childhood. But just because you’re in college doesn’t mean you can’t change your goals. College is a time to explore new things, seek new opportunities, and take risks. So, while you’re a student, expose yourself to all the grand opportunities that surround you! And if you change your mind about your future, don’t sweat it! As I said, you don’t have to stick to the career goals you brought with you to college.
4) Don’t Be Scared Of Rejection
If there’s one element that’s impacted me the most, it’s rejection. When applying to colleges, I got denied from my dream school and 10 others I applied to. And during my first year, I’ve faced many rejections between the day I moved in and the moment I wrote this article. I previously mentioned that I wanted to join the Long River Review. That didn’t happen. They took one look at my application and decided I wasn’t the one for them. I applied for a SURF Grant in January. Didn’t get it. I applied for numerous E-Board positions. Didn’t get any of them.
Rejection sucks, but there’s a silver lining to it. In most cases, rejection leads to an even better path. By not getting into the Long River Review, I joined Her Campus and the Daily Campus. By not getting any E-Board positions, I sought other opportunities to gain some leadership skills. I recently became a UNIV facilitator, where I’ll be helping first-year Honors students transition from high school to college.
Sometimes, we don’t get what we want. And that’s okay because when we don’t get what we want, more doors open. If you receive a rejection and it stings you, just remember that tomorrow’s a new day. It’s totally okay to feel hurt because of rejection. But just remember not to let it prevent you from trying.
5) And Lastly, Don’t Rush. Enjoy Life While You Can
When I became a UConn student, I believed that I needed to do everything in my first year. I consistently worried that if I didn’t get any E-Board positions or a certain GPA in my first year, then I’d be at a disadvantage in the future. But after spending months reaching out to support and hanging out with friends and family, I realized that I had been rushing the whole time.
You have so much time to accomplish every goal and desire you have. There’s no need to do it all in your first year. If you accomplish all your tasks in your first year, then what will you do in the rest of your college career? It is true that the more successful you are in your first year, the more advantages you’ll have in post-graduate life. But even if you don’t achieve much in your first year, you have three more years to do everything that you need to do to graduate and get a successful career. So, breathe, relax, and enjoy college.
Final Words
The first year of college can be an alarming experience. Just know you’re not alone. I was in your shoes at one point. I made many mistakes, I experienced a lot of rejections, I discovered new things about myself, and I changed my mind numerous times. But despite all that happened to me, I managed to push through and make it to my second year. So, if I can do it, you can as well.
Overall, my first year at UConn was an uneasy and turbulent experience. Sometimes, I felt like I was being held back by chains of anxiety and uncertainty. But thanks to these lessons and all the support I received, I was able to shatter those chains and become a much stronger woman.
If you’re currently nervous to go to college, if you’re feeling like you’re being held in chains, or if you need some inspiration, follow one or more of these lessons. If you don’t rush, or if you allow yourself to embrace rejection, your college life will be a much more inspiriting journey.