On January 1, 2021, not even a full two hours into my shift at Target, a coworker pulled me aside and told me she had to tell me something. We had gone to high school together and very briefly and very distantly were in the same mutual friend group, but both of us went our own ways by senior year having minimal contact with each other. In the backroom behind guest services, she pulled out her phone, and I knew from the look on her face that what she was about to share with me would not be good.
To my horror, screenshots filled up her phone of a Discord channel named Juliette-and-other-fatties for the sole purpose of keeping tabs on and then tearing down people from high school by members of that original friend group. Neither of us had spoken to them since high school and before graduation roughly four years ago. My heart rate quickened and sweat formed on my brow as my face got hot and the room spun. I was having an anxiety attack at work as a wave of all the panic-inducing high school drama and feelings of self-loathing towards my body flooded back. At that moment I felt naive to think that leaving that baggage on the front of my high school steps would have fixed everything but that’s how it works for most people right? People grow up, go to college, get jobs, move far away just so they don’t even have to think about the place and the people they spent their most awkward years of their life with.
Suddenly that panic turned paranoia as I questioned where they were getting content to secretly attack me over? Was it my private Instagram account that I had them all blocked on for years? Was it messages in my internship’s Slack channel that one of the members of this group also happened to be in? Was it the very articles that I posted to Her Campus- one of the top things that come up when you Google my name?
So, here I am, someone with no real power or influence in the world, feeling absolutely drained and broken by four people determined to make me feel unworthy and unlovable. Now imagine millions of people doing that to you. Now imagine an entire institution doing that to you. Now imagine someone going on live television telling the world that you have no right to feel the way you do given your lived experiences.
It’s no secret that the British press and certain royal figures have been less than welcoming to Meghan Markle’s introduction to the royal family. More than just bullying and outright meanness, Markle was the subject of numerous racist attacks by the media that sought to perpetuate incredibly harmful stereotypes and ideas about Black women. While this form of harassment and exclusion was overt, let’s not forget about the acts of royals that would have undoubtedly affected Meghan.
It was the annual Christmas lunch at Buckingham Palace in 2017 and the press were still trying to make heads or tails of Meghan. In attendance was Princess Michael of Kent, who at this particular lunch where Meghan was to be in attendance, wore a highly offensive Blackamoor brooch. Blackamoor is an art style that centers around the stylized depiction of Black people, often in servant roles, that can be traced back to origins associated with colonialism and slavery.
It was not lost on anyone that Princess Michael of Kent’s decision to use a Black person as an ornament to adorn her dress, while also a member of one of the oldest institutions associated with colonialism is distasteful and ignorant at best and racist and hateful at worst. Wearing the piece on its own would justify pushback against the princess, but to wear such a piece to a function where she knew a Black woman soon to be entering her family would be there, calls into question her motives in sending a message to Meghan. She later apologized for wearing the brooch, saying that she was “very sorry that it has caused offense.”
If there were any lingering doubt of the sincerity on that apology, you should be aware that in New York City in 2004, she told a group of Black patrons to “go back to the colonies” and then tried to defend her statement by saying she has tried to pass as a Black woman in the past.
While many may still try and deny Meghan’s most recent allegations that a member of the royal family expressed concern over how dark her son’s skin would be, it is examples like Princess Michael that bring into focus how ardently some members of the royal family sought to drive Meghan away and make her feel less than.
Piers Morgan told the world following Harry and Meghan’s interview with Oprah that he “didn’t believe a word” about what Meghan had said about her mental health. When one of England’s most beloved and cherished institutions rejects you and the British press continues to spew hate towards you, is it really that difficult to think that it would take a toll on one’s mental health?
The world has been chipping away at Meghan Markle piece by piece, expecting her to take it because she’s in the public eye and because of the lack of sympathy for Black women and their mental health, as if they’re supposed to bear the brunt of the pain and react in any way.
The level of racism and vitriol targeting Meghan Markle is not something many people can relate to, but we’ve all at some point in our lives been made to feel excluded, undeserving, unappreciated, unloved, or disrespected. Meghan’s message throughout her interview was to have some compassion. Sympathy can go a long way in the healing process, not just for you, but for whom you extend your sympathy towards. No one may experience Meghan’s pain exactly, but one doesn’t need to in order to have some compassion for her.