Toxic relationships no doubt have detrimental effects on not only one’s state of mind, but also one’s outlook on the world. Knowing that you are in a toxic relationship and feeling like you don’t have the power to end it is excruciating. I’m here to tell you that you do. You do have the power to walk away; the power to choose your happiness.
Some of the truest words my mother has ever told me is that a break-up, as silly as it may sound, can feel like a death. Picture being around and doing everything with the person you love the most for two years straight and then suddenly, they’re gone. The feeling of grief is like my mother describes, similar to losing someone forever. But the point of this entry is not to upset my readers, it is to relate to my readers and speak the truth; we are stronger.
Photo by Christy Murray
I broke up with you in February _______. I acted like I was okay, for a while actually, but I wasn’t. I blamed you for “messing me up,” I told myself I was depressed because you told me I wasn’t enough, I told myself I was not worthy of love because you cheated on me, I told myself I was in the wrong because that’s what you always said. Ladies. Do not believe these lies, from him/her or from yourself.
Today _______, I thank you. I thank you because I don’t look down at the ground anymore when walking across campus. I thank you because while I was successful in school with the burden of your hatred on my shoulders, I am even more successful and thriving without it. I thank you because I finally understand what love isn’t. I thank you because you are another piece of millions that made me wonderful, strong, beautiful, worthy. Thank you for allowing me to rebuild what you broke.
Women, you can too.