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SBU | Wellness > Mental Health

Making The Call

Morgan Kilger Student Contributor, St. Bonaventure University
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at SBU chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

After a long dance rehearsal, I was having dinner with my best friends from the university dance team. Everything was fine and everyone was content. Out of nowhere, I became very overwhelmed. I looked at my friend and told her how I was feeling. We ultimately decided the stress was coming from dancing for three hours straight. 

I excused myself to go back to my apartment for the night. When I was by myself, I broke down. There was nothing wrong and there was no need for these overwhelming feelings of anxiety. That’s when I realized I needed help. 

I’ve struggled with my anxiety for most of my life. I don’t know when these feelings of anxiety first started to happen, but I think they started around the time my dad was diagnosed with cancer — he’s better now, don’t you worry. 

I was eight years old and watching my dad, whom I love very much, become so sick that I didn’t recognize him. It was terrifying. This caused me to become attached to my mom’s hip. Being attached to my mom’s hip became an issue when she would have to leave me for a period of time. 

I would panic at the thought that she wasn’t coming back, that something happened to my dad, and things of the sort. 

When my dad went into remission before I started high school, we thought my anxiety would lessen. Since therapy wasn’t working and my parents didn’t want to put me on medication, they decided we would just ride it out. 

It didn’t work. 

Up until six months ago, my anxiety was manageable, but I would still have sudden bursts of anxiety that would last up to days at a time. Six months ago, my anxiety got worse. I stayed in a constant state of worry, to the point where I would become physically sick, stop eating and have interrupted sleep. 

After my post-dance panic attack, I decided I needed help. I called my mom, and she agreed that I should do something. She hesitated when I said I want to try medication, but she ultimately said it was okay. 

The phone call to my doctor was the scariest phone call I’ve ever made. I felt defeated asking for help, but I knew I was supported, and it was judgment-free. 

At this point of writing this article, I’ve been on medication for a few days, and I already see a change. So, it’s okay to get the help you’re scared to get. You got this. 

Morgan Kilger

SBU '26

Morgan is a second-year writer and co-social media chair for St. Bonaventure University’s chapter of Her Campus, and is very excited to continue writing about what she is passionate about. This includes: mental health, pop culture, academic tips, and life experiences. She is also excited to be part of the executive board this year and help bring HCSBU to life on social media.

Outside of Her Campus, you can find Morgan as Communications Officer for SBU College Democrats, a student ambassador, and dancing with the SBU Dance Team. As for her studies, she is a senior history and women’s studies double major with a political science minor. Morgan aspires to work in a museum or university archive.

In her free time, Morgan enjoys being herself with her loved ones. Whether it’s watching Riverdale with her roommates or taking post-dinner trips to Wendy’s, she loves to spend time with her friends. She’s also working through her “to be read” list before she graduates, which is pages upon pages long (every pun intended).