A way of being; our inner, self-centered, #1 fan, the ego. It supports us all and gives us the power to feel good about what we do and who we are at our cores. Once you find and connect with your ego, you will discover the power it holds for you.
The ego as it presents is a truly undesirable quality to surround yourself with, and or exude.
Many of our perceptions of an ego rest on different, detestable people; that one guy you used to date, the professor who took busy work too seriously or maybe that one annoying, arrogant character in the most recent book you read. We all think of somebody when the word ego is brought to mind.
We may be well trained in identifying when somebody is acting a bit full of themselves, but how well acquainted are you with acting full of yourself?
This may sound pompous, a belief or way of being we’re told to avoid, but having your own ego is grounds for living an unbothered life.
Unlike what we observe in the outward egos around us: arrogance, poor listening skills, a need to be right and a necessity for praise; inward egos are unseen, even envied. They develop as we get to know and better ourselves; they feel, look and are a lot different than the classic arrogant fool you used to know.
Someone with an outward ego may feel the need to be validated because they themselves feel invalid. They search for validation through scare tactics, focusing on others’ worst attributes, putting people down and ignoring what those around them have to say. Yet an inward ego, a healthy one, doesn’t inherit any of those traits or mannerisms.
If doubting your intentions, meekly acting on what you want and being unsure of your values, styles and choices is what’s born from not backing the core of who you are, then why not simply back the core? Easier said than done, yet just as well simpler done than doubted.
Pinpoint your values, think about how you want to act, who you want to be and what you believe. If you’re not already all these things, what’s stopping you?
When we allow a bit of arrogance in embracing the core of what makes us ourselves, we become free, self-confident, value-focused and simply aware of our true selves’ desires: who we want to be in the world.
Create yourself in who you believe yourself to be. Use your space in the world as what it truly will only ever be: your own. Cut out the voices that lie between who you are and your actions. Simply believe and act.
In doing this, we create a space in the world that can act as a rightful force of unwavering confidence. Who are we to doubt when it is us doing the reassuring?Â
Allowing the mind to see and believe what makes it tick, what makes its actions meaningful; this is to discover yourself and give your ego a voice. While we’ve been told to avoid this trait our whole lives, if it is embraced via you embracing yourself, it is, and makes you desirable.
In this, the feeling of craving validation is lost; you validate yourself. You act without need for validation, as to act is to inadvertently validate yourself; the path from your thoughts to your mind is unhindered, uninterrupted by others, as your ego has made it truly your own.
How can we act knowingly and clearly if what we’re acting on stems from somewhere other than our core? Confidence to act is born when it comes from within, so from within, your actions must be born from your values.Â
The simple formula for an ego: identify your own values, ones that harbor no voices but yours. Feel the sense of clarity that comes from believing your own values. Connect your action straight to the feeling of this belief.
Leave no time to consider other voices, act purely as you and feel good about it. If you don’t feel good about it? Rework what you believe until you can.
With our space defined and our beliefs given full credit, an egotistic woman makes for a confident stride, a strong helping hand, an empathetic listening ear and a powerful, unapologetic writer. May all our egos strive onward in an admirable manner.