When I made the decision to move to another state for college, I was expecting to learn and discover many things; however, I was not expecting to discover the ability to be positive about my own body. In fact, although I had never been considered obese and perhaps my biggest physical flaw was that I’m on the short side, I expected college to reinforce the numerous negative thoughts I harbored about myself. I expected to see a lot of women who were in great physical shape, and I did, but I also saw men and women of many shapes and sizes who were both confident and comfortable in their own bodies.
I don’t remember when exactly I began to recognize my own body as beautiful. Upon my arrival in Pittsburgh, I made the same three goals that many students make before their freshman semester: eat healthy foods, exercise regularly and avoid the Freshman 15 at any and all costs. Being in college and having the ability to make my own decisions about food is invaluable. It is easy for us to nod and smile when our parents remind us to eat healthier foods or point out the dangers in our diets, but I don’t think I really understood just how terrible my eating habits were until I had to consciously make the decision about what to eat without my parents or teachers to guide me. Even though I didn’t go to the gym nearly as regularly as I intended to (read: Netflix is life), walking everywhere definitely contributed toward the exercise goal I had set for myself.
After my first semester, I felt like I was on top of the world. For the first time, I liked how I looked in the mirror and in pictures. People who had known me through high school regularly told me that I “looked great,” and it was those comments that helped me to feel better about myself. The second semester slump took hold, unfortunately, and once again, I began to have doubts about my body as I regained the weight I had lost and then some. But even still, I felt better about myself than I ever had.
Perhaps the most important role in my newfound body peace was that of clothing. In high school, we had a dress code, and all of us, more or less, dressed the same despite the differences in our bodies. Although I learned how to dress in a respectable fashion that would suit me well in my professional endeavors further down the road, I did not learn how to dress for my body type until I got to college. Recognizing that I didn’t have to dress a certain way meant I could dress myself in clothes I felt that I looked good in, and this gave me more confidence than anything else.
Even though I feel that I have come a long ways in terms of making peace with my body, I know that I still have a long way to go and that there will always be room for growth in this area. I am glad to have made the progress I have, and I hope that at least some of you reading this will begin to see the beauty in your own bodies, too.