Recently, there has been an abundance of arguments between my friends and me regarding which condiment reigns supreme, and obviously, the answer is ranch. That led to another argument on which ranch is the best. Some people will tell you that all ranch tastes the same, but those people are the ones who think all bottled water tastes the same. As someone who uses an unethical amount of ranch and as a true midwesterner, I feel obligated to make a formal, ranked list of which chain restaurants have the holy grail of condiments.
10. Mcdonald’s
Okay, I might get hate for this, but out of the major burger joints, this one is the most tolerable. It doesn’t taste like Hidden Valley straight to the face, yet it has a notable amount of zing and a balanced texture that actually adds to the flavor of McNuggets.
9. Arby’s
This is another one I might get hate for, but the mozzarella sticks and curly fries dipped in this are *chef’s kiss.* It reminds me of the McDonald’s ranch but is a little bit thicker, which makes sure it blends well with their food.
8. KFC
As someone who lived in Kentucky for two years of their life, I can confirm the validity of KFC’s buttermilk ranch. This is packed with herbs, probably copied and pasted from the chicken. You can tell that there was special attention put on their ranch because their chicken alone doesn’t do it for some people (I am some people).
7. Chick-fil-A
This and Chick-fil-A sauce must be eaten with every single item on their menu. They are more aware than KFC that condiments are the star of the show and definitely deliver. Petition for them to sell their ranch in a bottle too.
6. Popeye’s
I’m gonna say it. I think Popeye’s ranch is better than Chick-fil-A. Aside from their food, the condiments surpass Chick-fil-A’s as well. If you haven’t sat in your car in silence after a bad day, dipping their ungodly large chicken sandwich in their ranch and blackened ranch, you haven’t lived. This tastes the most homemade out of fast food ranches and adds more to the meal than you could imagine.
5. Applebee’s
While their food is questionable, there is no doubt that their ranch is delicious. They go a little heavy on the buttermilk, but that’s what we want sometimes with a proper herb ratio. Next time you go out with that friend who suggests Applebee’s, get a side of ranch to cope.
4. Buffalo Wild Wings
This is a given since it is a wing joint, but this ranch is addicting. If every square inch of your food is not covered in it, and you don’t get an upcharge for how much you’re using, you are not doing it right.
3. Texas Roadhouse
It is literally made from scratch and tastes like it was made from love. The rolls dipped in their ranch are a match made in heaven, and nobody can tell me otherwise. I would go as far as to say that I prefer my steak dipped in their ranch versus A1 sauce. It is on the thicker side and they don’t overdo it with spices, which is absolutely perfect as it doesn’t overpower what you’re really there for.
2. Red Robin
The reason that I look forward to eating here is the ranch. As an adult that still orders chicken tenders and fries almost everywhere they go, I can confidently say that Red Robin has solid chicken tenders and fries, but the ranch is the star of the show.
1. Wing Stop
I will have this at my wedding and funeral and every other important life function. I don’t know how it is so magical, but their ranch has the creaminess, herbiness, and buttermilk down to a science. My midwestern taste buds cannot express the love I have for this ranch.
If you don’t get ranch at these restaurants after reading this list, congratulations! You’ve wasted your time. These are the holy grail of chain ranches and you’re not eating right if you order a meal without these.