Do you look in the mirror and like the person you see? Do you go to bed at night at peace with your soul? Simply put, do you like who you are?
If you answered no to any (or to perhaps all) of these questions, do not panic. Do not lose hope. Just like anything worth having in life, the journey to self-love is not effortless. It requires strength— a skill you possess. You’ve made it this far. Your resilience is evident.
Contrary to popular belief (and to Instagram) self-love is more than posting a selfie. It is more than doing a facial or chopping your hair off after he left you on “read” for 23 hours. It is more than purchasing your entire cart online shopping or perfecting your makeup before a night out.
While these acts are pleasurable and provide results, the effects are merely temporary. Alone, they will not better who you are as a human being. You must dig deeper.
Self-love is doing the difficult things that you know are good for you. It is not always doing what you want, but rather doing what you need— watering plants that feed you.
Self-love is subjective— it looks different for everyone.
Perhaps it’s switching your major to what sets your heart on fire, not what appeases the “one size fits all” standard of success. Perhaps it’s removing the person you once cared about off your phone, not gazing at their name with a weight of the “what if” factor.
Perhaps it’s saying no and saying no often to plans, not faking happy at a scene that doesn’t serve you. Or perhaps it’s starting over, not trying to heal in an environment that has repeatedly hurt you.
Whatever it is, whatever your gut is telling you to do, do it. Stop putting a band-aid on an open wound. Stop avoiding the difficult route to peace and embarking on the easy route to mediocrity. You are better— you deserve better.
Self-love is more than a hashtag. It is a powerful light. And while some days it will shine brighter than others, it will always be there to warm your soul.