I love sex. I know, crazy, right? And, surprise! There is nothing wrong with that. I love the way that I am able to physically show my love for my significant other and the way I can be shown love in return. Being able to have that in a relationship is a deeply connecting experience and can deepen the trust and feelings of closeness inside of the relationship. It may be very unorthodox for a girl to openly talk about enjoying sexual activities, but it is part of nature and human experience. Women should be able to want to have sex for pleasure and without wanting a child. When a male talks openly about sex, it is not viewed as being so shocking, but usually, if it comes from a female, it is seen to be shocking, disgraceful, and something that should be looked down upon.
I am a person who is naturally sexual, as I view sex as being a type of artform if done responsibly. Sex is music, and sex is art. The combining and the dancing of bodies having the goal of physical communication is such a beautiful thing. If done responsibly and healthily, I strongly believe no one should be ashamed of their sexuality.
I used to be ashamed of my sexuality due to realizing the stigma it holds on women. If a female is open about her sexuality, she is called names, harassed, or looked down upon by others. This is most likely due to society’s views on sex. American culture treats the subject of sex as a very taboo one. We try to keep the word and concept hidden from our children, we avoid having conversations with our children or our parents or even our peers, and we are most likely to keep our sexuality and our thoughts on sex to ourselves. The way we learn about sex is through secrecy and hidden curiosity, so that is how we treat it for most of our lives.
Sex education in schools is mostly to blame for this. Instead of embracing the sexual nature of humans and teaching students responsible and safe ways to go about having sex and making decisions about sex, educators try and teach the students to be abstinent. As we can see, this is not an effective way to keep our children safe. Students will still have sex. So, in reality, this is actually teaching the students to be sneaky and ‘hush-hush’ about having sex. This leads to all sorts of problems such as unplanned pregnancy, STDs, and other emotional or physical issues that can come with having sex. This is because individuals feel as if they have to now stay quiet about the fact they are having sex, so they will not be comfortable going to anyone with questions or issues.
Another huge problem with our sex education system is that it does not allow us to express ourselves or feel comfortable with the natural urges we have. If students feel ashamed or feel as if they have to hide the fact that they are having sex, they will not go to any authority figure with important questions or urgent issues. Instead, they will try to find a way to hide them just as they hide the fact that they are having sex in the first place. They will find false information on the internet, from friends, and other places where it may not be accurate. Most people do not even know important parts of the reproductive system!
Instead of telling students that they should not be having sex, it would be more beneficial to help students be knowledgable about safe and responsible ways they can go about making decisions for having sex. We should not have to feel bad for something that is human nature and that is natural. During puberty, our bodies are changing rapidly, leaving most of us confused and lost. If we embrace these changes and do not treat them as if they are something to repress, it will make this transition a lot easier.
So, it is okay to express your sexuality. It is okay for women to express their sexuality, it is okay for men to express their sexuality, and it is okay for anyone to express their sexuality. Your sexuality is a part of who you are and is not something to be ashamed of. It is a way that you can express your inner fantasies, show your partner that you love, care for, and respect them, and also show yourself that you love, care for, and respect yourself. If we can revisit the way we are teaching our youth how to approach and view sex, it may benefit them. The preaching of abstinence and scaring them with pictures of STDs and videos of childbirth is not working. Help them make healthy decisions about themselves and their bodies for a safer and more responsible way to go about things.Teach us about our bodies, teach us about safety, teach us about responsibility, teach us about respect, teach us about consent, teach us about sex. Because what is set in place is NOT working.
HXCO,
Kasidy