Getting sick is the worst. You feel awful and you’re stuck in bed until you get better. When you were little and you got sick, your mom or dad would stay home and take care of you, but when you’re in college you have to take care of yourself. No soup in bed and no one to take your temperature. It’s awful. So here’s the stages of getting sick in college.
Stage 1: You feel the illness coming.
You’ve coughed, you’ve sneezed, you’ve felt that familiar tickle in the throat. You feel cold even though it’s 80 degrees out. Suddenly everyone becomes a suspect, because one of them got you sick.
Stage 2: You call your mom and she listens to you vent for an hour about how awful you feel.
Truth be told, calling my mom is my step one. I’ll cry and tell her I don’t have time to be sick. She and my dad usually send me a get-well package because my parents are #toopureforthisworld.
Stage 3: You lie around in bed, dying, occasionally begging your roommate to bring you medication or food.
If your roommate is a pre-med, you may ask them to diagnose you and they will most likely explain to you that they are still not a doctor and can’t diagnose you. If your roommate is amazing, like mine, they will bring you chicken soup and blue Gatorade because those are your sick foods and they are also #toopureforthisworld.
Stage 4: You call your mom again.
She offers to send you something to make you feel better and tells you that you need to go to the doctor. You complain. She tells you that you have to go, and she makes said doctor’s appointment for you
Stage 5: You actually go the Student Health Center. You pull up those WebMD results and your physician is definitely not impressed with your self-diagnosis.
You’re pretty sure that you’re dying. The student health doctor says flu, you say cancer.
Stage 6: The doctor writes you a prescription and tells you that you should be back to full health soon. There’s also a 90% chance that you’ll call your mom, again.
True story, I had the flu and called my mom so many times that she drove down to come see me because I had been complaining so much about being sick, she thought something more must be wrong. Nope, I am just a baby when it comes to illness and truly just had the flu.
Stage 7: After what feels like an eternity (but is more likely about 3 days), you’re happy, healthy and so far behind on your schoolwork you could cry.
Real gif of me crying when I realize that the sication (combination of sick + vacation) was not an actual vacation and now I had to do all my make up work because I laid in bed watching Grey’s Anatomy for three days.
Pretty much getting sick in college is a constant stage of feeling terrible and calling your parents to complain about it. On the bright side, even if you’re like a year behind on all your schoolworks, you probably got to catch up on your shows.