Who am I?
I ask myself those three little words so many times, yet it is always the same answer: I honestly have no idea. Finding who you really are doesn’t come with a huge epiphany like it does in movies. Finding yourself is, and only can be, a story that is created throughout the the journey of your entire life. I truly believe that who you are contains a collection of all of your thoughts, fears, actions, interactions, etc. that you have ever had and will ever have. The question that most people have is… what does that even mean?
For the longest time I thought that what I accomplished was what made me who I was. Whenever I tried something I wasn’t good at the first time I would completely quit and never try it again. I felt that if I did do something, I should be able to do it to perfection, and if I couldn’t, then I simply was a failure. I realize now that my way of thinking was not healthy.  As I got older, I began to base my self-worth through a guy’s coded messages of whether he found me attractive or not, and soon after came my own comparisons between myself and other women. In college, who I was became how I looked and what I weighed. It was a never ending cycle and I have now come to realize that none of these things make me who I really am.Â
There isn’t a guy that can mend all of your problems, there isn’t a perfect diet and exercise regime that will make you love yourself, and there certainly isn’t a better way to make yourself miserable than comparing yourself to the photo shopped celebrities on the cover of Cosmopolitan. Who you are really isn’t what everyone thinks of you. Who you are isn’t even what you think of yourself. Who you are is something that you can feel. You can’t think about it, you can’t analyze it. You can only feel it.
Imagine a million chances in this life that have happened so that you were born. Any one of those choices could have resulted in you not being here. What if your mom didn’t get that job that allowed her to meet your father? What if there was one little, insignificant difference in the timeline of the universe that resulted in you giving your first breath? That is what makes you special and that is one of the things in this life that you need to hold onto. You are here. That in itself is a miracle.
What we as humans have to understand is that each one of us is special. Everyone in this world will change at least one person’s life, if not more. You will always have an effect on someone in a beautiful way that only you can create. This is your journey. College is a journey and like my mother likes to say: it is only a chapter in the book of your life. Make it count. Find yourself. Love who you are and don’t listen to what anyone else has to say because it is your life and your decisions that make this journey yours, and in turn it is what makes you who you are.
Always remember that things are ever changing, ever moving, and never staying the same. College is one of the best places to find out who you are… and if you don’t during that time, remember that life is a journey and there are many more chapters in the book of your life.
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