One of my biggest mistakes I’ve made in my life was convincing myself that it would be more aesthetically pleasing to be classified as one “thing.” To have one overbearing personality trait that people would know me for. They would hear “classy,” for example, and their minds would jump straight to my name. I wanted that so badly, for some odd reason. I wanted to be easily classified: something that would look pretty on paper, like my resume.
I laugh at the idea of that now.
All of us contain multitudes. We are not defined by one omnipotent trait. Rather, we are one hell of a mess. That’s right. We’re a mess. An absolutely thrilling, fascinating, unorganized mess. We have layers upon layers of personality traits, habits, hobbies, passions, love interests, stories, backgrounds, childhoods. All of these things shape us into who we are today.
We can’t neatly categorize everything that makes us into who we are; it’s nearly impossible. If you’ve found a way to do that, please let me know, because I’ve been trying to do it for 18 years with no success. But this is sort of my point, here: you’re allowed to be messy.
You’re allowed to be defined by more than one trait. You’re allowed to be contradictory and unpredictable. You’re allowed to be a little bit of a mess here and there, because life isn’t perfect. You’re allowed to react emotionally. You’re allowed to speak what’s really on your mind. And you’re allowed to be imperfect, capable of forgiveness, and willingness to be forgiven. None of us are perfect.
A quote that perfectly encompasses the message I’m trying to convey is one by Allie Michelle, poet and author of “The Rose that Blooms in the Night.” I stumbled on this quote by her and it floored me:
“Be a walking contradiction. Be strong and soft. Be deep and lighthearted. Be beautiful and intelligent. Be confident and humble. Be someone with a quick wit and cheap sense of humor. Be content climbing a mountain and enjoying the sweetness of doing nothing. The world may try and classify you as one thing because that is far easier to understand than a person who has a little bit of everything in them. And you may feel misunderstood for a while, but just remember your people can only find you if you’re brave enough to be yourself. There are parts of you that you have yet to discover. There is greater love that you have yet to find. There are experiences that are far beyond your imagination. And it’s all waiting for you. So set aside your expectations and go explore it.”
Enough said.